Golden Retriever GFEverybody knows Scuba is actually an acronym. Self Contained Underwater Breathing Apparatus. But a Tuba could also be like Scuba except it's a TERRIBLE underwater breathing apparatus.
holothuroid@GoldenRetrieverGF
It might help with going down at least.
@holothuroid yes, in the water at least. Otherwise I have met very few Tuba players I would like to go down on.
Charles ☭ 
is a Green@GoldenRetrieverGF @holothuroid
Once upon a time, around 30 years ago, the piece of fiction contained in an issue of 'On Our Backs'* had the phrase "tuba players are the best kissers."
* a lesbian magazine with a lot of content about kissing https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/On_Our_Backs
@celesteh @holothuroid to be fair I've never dated a tuba player. Flute, French Horn and Trumpet. French Horn was by far the best kisser. So maybe the amount of loops could indicate the degree of good kissies? Needs experimenting. 🤔🤔🤔
@GoldenRetrieverGF @holothuroid
I just assumed it was mouthpiece size. . . .
@celesteh @holothuroid well that claim needs experimenting as well. Loops vs mouth piece size.
@GoldenRetrieverGF @holothuroid
I propose a study including an alphorn player, the player of a python tuba, a trombonist, a tenor horn player and a french horn player.
We hypothesise that the alphorn will be worst and that the tenor horn player will be better than the trombone player, even if both use the same size mouthpiece.
The other instruments are present primarily for repertoire. Part of the grant application includes a composer in residence and a larger call for scores.
@celesteh @holothuroid seems sound.