hi cis white guys

it is never okay to comment on a photo of a trans woman with “i’d do you”

stop it forever

@tillybridges Nor anyone at all. Sorry for your agita.
@tillybridges yeah guys, it's not the compliment you seem to think it is.
@tillybridges also, to be fair, it's not a white thing. it's just a cis men thing. :/
@purplerabbit I said white for a reason, they’re the instigators and the one who wrapped it all up in Epstein and everything else
@tillybridges Wait, you mean that all women, trans or cis, don’t immediately crave me when I flippantly sexualize them? This can’t be right, for I am a desirable sex god.

@adhdeanasl @tillybridges

Yes, I mean that too, perhaps a bit ironically than you did. 😃

Some women, trans or cis, actually might like that sort of comment.

Please don't speak for all people of a category that you belong to.
Nobody appointed you official spokesperson for all.

Your comment is best taken as advice under consideration, not as a commandment.

Leave individuals to be individuals.

It would be a bit silly if I started speaking for all Indians/Americans/bald people etc. 😃

@purrperl @adhdeanasl hey bud

when a person from a marginalized community speaks on the gross sexual harassment she continually experiences

your job

is to listen and believe her

and not say that some trans women might like being sexually harassed by cis white men

do better

do SO much better

WHAT THE FUCK

@tillybridges Must have been some lousy comment - the account doesn’t even seem to have any replies at all any more. @[email protected]
@purrperl @adhdeanasl @tillybridges the fact that many cis men so frequently take the gamble of "but *some* women like it" explains much of (if not most of) the unsolicited sexual comments, otherwise known as sexual harassment.

@purrperl @adhdeanasl @tillybridges Even if some people would enjoy that sort of comment, you would need to talk to them to know that before writing such an inconsiderate sexist thing unasked. You don't know which people might enjoy this, so you have the responsibility to act with due consideration. And with due consideration, you would not write such things.

This is some weird twist on „not all men“ you are doing...

@rootsandcalluses @adhdeanasl

Yes, I will repeat, over and over, "not all men" and "not all women".
It's a political trope that we need to examine closely.

Diversity:
Not all men are bad. Not all women are good.
Not all men are good. Not all women are bad.

The world doesn't exist to soothe anyone's sensibilities, no matter how offended they may be, and no matter how many people they may pull together to support their feelings of being offended.

Off to have a good day. Please do the same. 😃

@purrperl @adhdeanasl Please do examine the „not all men“ concept more closely. This is a systemic issue and finding a good man (I know some wonderful people who you'd consider men. I don't care much about gender.) does not change anything. No one has to go looking for people to get offended by your words. You are doing a good job offending a wide range of people.

Blocking you now. Wishing you all the best.

@purrperl @adhdeanasl @tillybridges

TL;DR: PURRPERL: APOLOGIZE IMMEDIATELY FOR GROSS PHOTO COMMENT !

purrperl you should be ashamed. now is not the time to play word games with the person you harmed. you are ignoring tillybridge's points. lest you try to play games about context, i am writing specifically about your comments in which you wrote that tillybridges "does not speak for all trans people" and that "some" trans women might like to be objectified

regarding your harmful notion that some trans women might like the kind of objectifying comments that you wrote (translation: you made up an excuse to justify harassing women online), tillybridges pointed out that your comment on her photo was NOT OK. I put it in capital letters for emphasis since you want to gloss over tilly's very clear response that she said DONT DO THAT

It is time to grow up from this stupid attitude of harassing and bothering trans women because you enjoy it. You must know by now when anyone tells you they feel harassed, bothered, and especially dont want you to write objectifying comments about them (and says dont do that to others) that the correct course of action is to APOLOGIZE and DONT DO IT AGAIN

furthermore you must be not only insensitive to issues on transgender people, but you must apparently willfully dont care to show any kindness or understanding to trans people as a whole or on the individual level

to say that "one trans person does not speak for all trans people" is subverting tillybridge's lived experiences in order for you to be able to live in denial about the harm of your comments, thus piling on further harm

if you cannot WRITE AN APOLOGY to tillybridges , then be prepared for lots of drama and trying to play word games with people who are more informed than you.

and be prepared to be left behind and left out of important conversations and meaningful opportunities for connection with people because you cannot accept that you have done harm to people.

i hope you lack sufficient attitude of entitlement to resist changing yourself for the better, and that you also decide to grow up.

lastly,

⚠️ DONT FUCK WITH TILLYBRIDGES ⚠️

@onemoreday @adhdeanasl @tillybridges

You are hilarious! If only you knew how hilarious.

"I'd do you." is not sexual harassment, or objectification, imho. And I am not alone this opinion.

To insist that the world conform to your opinions is just silly.

There is diversity in the world. Different people like different things. It's just that simple.

Ok, I won't respond to tillybridges, or anyone who thinks that they get to speak for a whole group.

Bye. Have a good life. 😃

@purrperl You are wrong, and the best thing you can do at this point is delete your post.

@jo

The best thing you can do is read what you like, and ignore what you don't like.

@purrperl Except when you're bothering someone in my community, in which case I reserve the right to tell you off.

I see you're *still* going on about this, even reaching out to other trans women to get their opinion on the matter. Please just drop the stick.

@jo

Who appointed you king here?

At least I am open enough to talk to my trans friends and get their thoughtful opinions. Instead of hurling expletives at someone mindlessly.

"He was SPEAKING HIS MIND on the Internet! How awful! I will tell him to fuck off. That will show him."

Say what you like, and don't listen to anything you don't like. Don't like hearing what I say? Ignore me. Block me. Move on. It's a nice day. Enjoy it.

@purrperl you really need to shut the fuck up and back the fuck off

@tillybridges
hi guys

it is never okay to comment on a photo of a woman with “i’d do you”

stop it forever

@jorgaborg I said what I said for a reason and maybe you could listen instead of changing my words
@tillybridges o i know that you were making a point (in fact, i reposted it because i agree!) but it does also apply to cis women. it applies to everyone! sexual harassment is not cool regardless of gender identity.

@jorgaborg but that’s not what I’m talking about here

this is the equivalent of “all lives matter”

I am not talking about sexual harassment in general

I am talking about cis white men who are chasers and have orchestrated the entire anti-trans movement

@tillybridges i literally said i agree with you. i reposted your original thing because it’s a good message and then also put a More General Version out there because that’s also a good message. there is no need for you to get this pressed lmao
@jorgaborg just listening when trans women talk is hard for you huh?
@tillybridges absolutely. Edited to remove things that diluted the OPs intent.
@tadbithuman okay but this is a real problem for trans women that’s caused by cis white men and we can and should talk about that and not widen the scope when that’s not the point here
@tillybridges weird how no one wants to listen to what you're saying and want to change your words; but they seemed pretty straightforward and clear.

@tillybridges Or any woman for that matter. That just sucks bad.

Also, I love how they think that's supposed to be a compliment but you just want to hurl and then hurl things in their general direction.

@tillybridges ewwwww. I need a shower just from reading that. You're right.
There are some disgusting folk out there.
@tillybridges the white dudes…the white dudes are not ok.
@minmi *cis
@tillybridges yes sorry white cis dudes. They are extremely not ok.
@tillybridges pro tip for cis straight guys: if cis women would find your "compliments" gross, so will trans women. Sexual harassment isn't allyship.
@cyberwitch @faithisleaping @tillybridges Unfortunately they're probably under the impression that cis women don't find that behavior gross.

@tillybridges or a gender fluid or non-conforming.... IJS

No one wants that from a stranger or someone impersonating others on the internet to gain your affection or private stuff.

@tillybridges
(Billy Joel spoof)
Blame it all on yourself
Cuz you look like a woman to me...
@tillybridges I guess I am also guilty of it, to some extent, with this post but why are *so many* people replying with “improved” versions of your post and then doubling down? I get trying to tack something on but … back away if the OP says “no thanks”

@griotspeak

transphobia.

the implicit societal rule of protecting cis white men.

and a failure of literacy to not understand that talking about X does not mean I do not care about Y, or that Y has a place in the specific discussion about X.

take your pick.

@griotspeak I mean I’m guilty too, and I apologize for stepping into that mess, @tillybridges.

My intention by boosting was not to improve or correct, but to extend into my own sphere by saying “yes and in my specific case…” because there are those who do think they would get a pass.

That wasn’t intended to be any kind of statement about or criticism of the OP, but rather support for the OP with some addition by me specifically looking toward who tends to do that to me.

I tend to boost as a starting point that then can be expanded on in my own sphere, rather than making a statement about the OP sphere. But I could see how that read as criticism of the OP so I just deleted it. Doubling down is absurd. I am sorry.

@tillybridges I'm sorry this keeps happening to you and sorry for all the derailing comments and the extra harassment you got because you spoke up.
I hear you loud and clear.