Mastodawn

When I was a tween or young teen, there weren't very many kids online or on the BBSes I used to use, so I talked to people of all ages all the time and probably annoyed them occasionally, but it was fine.

Eventually, my dad signed us up for something a bit more kid friendly/educational and we joined Prodigy.

Holy shit Prodigy was infested with paedophiles.

I think making something specifically for kids is a way bigger safeguarding concern than kids turning up to a thing not pitched at them, as long as there's no scope for DMs, but the people who wrote the rulesabout online interactions were Meta lobbyists, not people who actually have experience with being a kid in unsafe spaces.

Its not inherently bad to for a twelve year old to talk to an adult who is not related to them or paid to talk to them. For most of human history, its been normal. I had cross generational friendships at that age, one of which has lasted until the other person died of old age. (RIP Bob) These adults tended to be friends of my parents, adults I knew from volunteering or church, or sometimes neighbours. And one guy from a BBS.

Sqx. Flann 2h ago

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Charles 𝄢 H

In the early 90s, safeguarding concerns were used to push young people out of queer community. There were occasional youth groups, but in general, most adult queers were frightened to talk to people 12-18. This was a bad, isolating experience as a young person. I knew gay people existed, but I was stranded in a conservative mileue.

I've been a huge proponent of all ages spaces since I was a youth.

All ages music venues are especially important.

Counterculture needs to be accessible to people who need it and a lot of those people are young.

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really??????2d ago

@celesteh I have to actively undo my conditioning around this when young queer people try to befriend me. I understand how important it is to be a real actual older person with them (and how desperately I wish I had that), but it feels like walking on a precarious knife edge, with some ambiguous catastrophe about to befall both of us. These all ages spaces and shows are so crucial and beautiful

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Charles 𝄢 H 1d ago

@coolsquid

If you feel worried, it is 100% beyond reproach to meet them in a public space where other adults are around. Like a coffee shop or a library etc.

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ClaraBlackInk 1d ago

@celesteh I was a teen online in a band's forum and met all sorts of folks in that space. Including a friend who was so nervous to be straight passing and so worried how I would respond when he came out to me. He was so relieved after.

It made an enormous impression on me to have a similar age peer confide in me.

In that case the unmonitored nature of it was so good for both of us. I'm regularly sadden that its so hard to create that for others. It is fragile and difficult to build at scale.