It's pathetic really. Like wouldn't it be nice if we, in the UK, as a culture, were excited when new ideas and traditions come in instead of being scared and angry? Instead of inventing "You can't say Easter on eggs anymore" wouldn't it be nice if we went "Hey, these people have brought a festival where you can suddenly get really nice dates in pretty boxes and there are lovely shared suppers after dusk?"

It's like when the UK women's team did so well in the World Cup, and a bunch of miserable old gits started mithering on about how women's football wasn't real football. And meanwhile my Dad was delighted that now there was twice as much football on TV as there used to be. Not only was he not making a nuisance of himself whingeing on Facebook, he was actually happier. Almost like actually embracing something a bit new and a bit different is actually a nicer way to live.

But the rightwing media does love telling people anything new and different is a threat. I know why they do it of course, it's to stop us paying attention to that fact we're getting dragged into a stupid war to appease a paedophile with dementia, but I wish people didn't fall for it so easily.

It's like the uproar about Tesco replacing barcodes with QR codes, as if a change to the details of the stock management system used by a supermarket has any impact whatsoever on the lives of anyone who doesn't work in Tesco's logistics department. But suddenly some rightwing hack vomits up a thinkpiece about how QR codes are woke and suddenly everyone's waxing nostalgic about how the play of sunlight on the black and white stripes of a barcode takes them back to happy childhood afternoons shopping for salad cream and pickled eggs with their dear departed grandmother.