Michael W Lucas 5d ago

Researching my NYCBUG talk on 1 April reminded me of FretBSD.

In 2003, @dvl and I put up a fake web site about the UN forcing #FreeBSD and #NetBSD to merge. The site is gone, but the text is archived at

https://www.freebsddiary.org/fretbsd.php

A ComputerWorld reporter contacted Dan requesting more details for a story, so: we won!

The fifth paragraph, or #OpenBSD? My career peaked early. That last sentence is the finest thing I will ever write.

The FreeBSD Diary -- FreeBSD/NetBSD to merge

It's about time!

Show threadMichael W Lucas 

It was 2003. The US had just invaded Iraq for bogus reasons. Dan and I did a prank page saying that the UN was merging NetBSD and FreeBSD. What about OpenBSD? Well...

"Theo de Raadt could not be reached for comment. While Theo's home has been surrounded, UN peacekeeper troops have yet to storm the building and heavy casualties have been reported in the surrounding countryside. UN spokesmen insist that the siege is going according to plan, however, and Theo is expected to be available for integration in the new combined BSD at some date in late 2023. Of the two hundred eighty-nine casualties suffered by the UN troops at this time, the commanding officer insists that they were caused by a rampaging Canadian moose. Daniel Hartmeier, previously of the OpenBSD Project, insists that OpenBSD has no weapons of moose destruction. "

Mar 18 at 4:16pmWeb
Show threadMichael W Lucas 5d ago
My career is done. I can never top that.
Show threadWojo5d ago
@mwl Sooooo, no more books? Or just that we get the aftermath of peak performance?
Show threadMichael W Lucas 5d ago
@polishdub I shall spend the remainder of my life spewing out words and pining for lost glory.
Show threadWojo5d ago
@mwl I guess I can accept that.
Show threadLeifur Hauksson5d ago
@mwl maybe, but you've still continued writing gold. You wrote the line "the purpose of a system is what it does, and a computer does pain" less than a year ago. I was telling friends about that line just this weekend.
Show threadMichael W Lucas 5d ago
@leifur 
Show threadTim Chase5d ago
@mwl That and a message from Ken Thompson in your inbox? Surely you've peaked. 😛
Show threadBen Zanin4d ago
@gumnos @mwl there is still room for greater triumphs! For example you could find a way to make Knuth tell you to fuck off. That would be worth getting cast in bronze.
Show threadTim Chase4d ago

@gnomon

while I doubt that would be Knuthian in response (he's a practicing Lutheran and author of the book "3:16", suggesting there would be a distinct lack of profanity), one might get some other sort of response.

@mwl

Show threadMichael W Lucas 4d ago
@gumnos @gnomon oooh, a new goal!