Pretty Guy: Does basically nothing and women fall all over him

Nice Guy: Becomes a phrenologist in response

Always worth remembering that the OG Incel was a woman blogging about how desperate she was to lose her virginity.

I know I’m in the shitposting community but here’s story time for anyone who needs it (myself included probably and this may not be be super coherent as I’m still processing and getting over the breakup, or the incident as I like to call it, a year later )

This is also a loose connection of the thoughts so there’s probably a coherent idea in here somewhere

But when I entered college I was trying to make some friends as my highschool buddies moved outta state (we still communicate and game over discord) but there’s this one girl and the only reason we became friends is we shared the first year seminar and an English class.

Fast forward a bit and she asks me out and I take about a half a week to ponder (foreshadowing what I would call a snails pace in our relationship but frankly that an insult to the speed of snails)

And she’s definitely had her fair share of some traumatic relationships which with some other mental stuff she didn’t always want physical contact and sometimes she was… paranoid isn’t the right word, but I absolutely poured my heart into this relationship because after all these years I finally got a gf so I definitely had some rose tinted glasses on some her trauma responses such as calling my affection love dumping (she said it was a manipulation tactic used basically as “I’m sorry I’m sorry I love you so much” and she saw it as that)

Anyways there’s so much more but all in all I’m happy it happened but in retrospect and only in retrospect I’m glad it’s over

But I believe the right one is out there somewhere and it’s a matter of looking and finding someone who matches my weird

“Nice guy”

Fuck this incel nonsense.

Am ugly and fat, but I’m a nice person, respect everyone (who deserves respect), and I expect everything I do to be non transactional.

I help people because they need help and I can help.

results? built a friend’s group I adore (I literally admire them and sometimes I am still in disbelief that I’m their friend), and have women hit on me, also have a poly thing going on. And I have never had so much and such good sex.

“Nice” means being a good person, if you are nice to be transactional, then that isn’t nice, that’s a red flag… and a good thing women stay away from you.

yes, women can also be transactional, being an asshole is intersectional. but that is a slightly different tangent.

Also, I loathe that because bullshit like this the bar is so painfully low. It genuinely hurts me when a woman gives me a compliment that only reveals how fucking low the bar is. and it is so fucking low. that if you can’t pass it, then that’s on you.

if you want constructive advice, accept that no relationship is transactional. be proactive in socializing, not like going to bars to pick people up, but join active groups for your interests. D&D, political action groups, Mutual aids… attend regularly and before you know it you’ll have a healthy diverse friend group. assume no one is interested in you as a partner unless there’s a bit of flirting. Even if you don’t find a partner in those groups, those people have their own groups. and if they see you as a good person they will recommend you to their single friends. But this is not a guide to get laid. If you do all of this to get laid, you are a horrible person. and hopefully, they will sense it and not put anyone at risk. you do that because you love to [chosen group activity], and want to make friendships. Also, consent means they can say no whenever they want, even after a couple dates and you have to be mature and be like "that’s ok, I wish you well’ and not like “That B[slur]”.

If you are a basement dwelling incel with severe depression from loneliness and severe loniless from depression, you can crawl out of that depression by doing stuff. Joining mutual aids really did that for me, little by little I built a community for myself, and I’m now happy (was chronically depressed for so long I forgot what positive feelings feel like).

Great, you’re nice. Congratz on doing the absolute bare minimum.

Any hobbies she’s interested in as well? Or interesting hobbies in general? Any skill you have other than dislocating your shoulder, like changing the breaks on your car? Are you a Sub and want a Dom but she’s a Sub as well? Are you radiating any sexual energy? Heck some women find tax evasion as sexy as a sixpack.

I never understood this specific example. Why are people so obsessed with someone that’s already spoken for? It shows such a lack of respect for boundaries.

I’ve run into the type of guy that thinks it’s alright to harass someone because they’re in a relationship with someone they’re interested in, and what makes me sad is how so many see nothing wrong with it.

The greatest suffering in life, that anyone can experience no matter who they are, is unfulfilled expectations. Girl isn’t interested in you, Weather isn’t what you want. Boss didn’t give you a rise etc.

According to Buddhism solution is to stop expecting things of others, of life, of reality. You can only control yourself, expect of yourself if you must.

Perhaps a bit of an exotic philosophy, but I think it applies here nicely.