it's fine, Hercules punched the monster of pure energy and it exploded

also, a thunderbolt was located. apparently.

#Monsterdon

I mean like, I do get it, you defeat a monster, you get a bolt

but the bolt is where the monster died isn't it?

maybe Zeus is just gonna reach down and grab it

#Monsterdon

this Zeus isn't very convincing. very patriarchal and actually-concerned, and not even the slightest bit "I will fuck anything with a consciousness and several things without"

#Monsterdon

okay the score is bringing me back in this bit's aight

I suppose it won't last, we need to get back to boring bullshit soon

#Monsterdon

Urania is absolutely tripping on that potion

#Monsterdon

character in the movie *also* being jump-scared by the bad editing-room effects

#Monsterdon

happy International Women's Day

#Monsterdon

yay, that shot looking up at Hercules's chest is enough for me to tick off "Gratuitous Muscle Scot"

Cool electric net, too

#Monsterdon

"rise and let your burning flesh melt together"

okay, okay, I'm up already

#Monsterdon

I'm having a real "Blindsight scramblers" moment over here

"who [was it]?"
"yes, while fighting the Amazons"
[proceeds as if this is in any way an answer]

these characters react as if they understand language, but I'm not entirely convinced

#Monsterdon

anyway, let's have our hero choke a woman to death with no setup

#Monsterdon

WHY IS DAEDALUS A GOD
WHY IS DAEDALUS A WOMAN
WHY DOES DAEDALUS HAVE A CODPIE—okay wait actually I can answer both of those questions with the same answer

#Monsterdon

this movie is failing to inspire much direct interest in me so I guess since I'm already thinkin about Daedalus I'll share a bit of snooplore:

I know the myth of Daedalus mostly because of Deus Ex, because I found the character of the same name to be so compelling (not that they're a deep character, mind)

thanks, Warren Spector et al.

#Monsterdon

what the fuck is going on

#Monsterdon

somehow, Minos returned

(at the risk of paying this movie a compliment: at least it bothered to explain how)

#Monsterdon

ANYWAY CUE THE ELECTRO-CICADAS IN THE SCORE

#Monsterdon

Glaucia is the Mediterranean Candidate

#Monsterdon

Oh okay Daedalus is not a god and is just… an alien from a 50s movie?

idk I feel like Minos is delivering lines that… belong to Daedalus?

this science-against-the-gods thing belongs in the mouth of Daedalus, not Minos!

#Monsterdon

it's a free upgrade to make Daedalus the big-bad in this one

Minos came to Daedalus for aid in building the Labyrinth to contain the Minotaur. He is *definitionally* more capable than the king.

the tale of Daedalus tells us (by way of Icarus) about hubris against the gods

you had to do so much more work to flip this shit on its head, resurrect Minos, then make him the villain

when Daedalus was right there

YOU EVEN GOT THE COSTUMING RIGHT BUT YOU GOT IT SO WRONG IN THE SCRIPT, GUYS

#Monsterdon

anyway cool Gundam fight between Minos and Hercules, I guess. I would have enjoyed it more if the script had sucked a lot less

#Monsterdon

for once, denouement

in a movie where truly we have no reason whatsoever to care

#Monsterdon

RE: https://social.coop/@bitprophet/116196807686853673

Good job with tag discipline, #Monsterdon folks. It makes me feel nice that we're good enough fedi neighbors that people who want to opt-out for good can do so!

Proud of y'all 

GROW HERCULES
GROW

#Monsterdon

and that's how Uranus was born

#Monsterdon

Hercules fucks off back into space (but like, being a constellation, so even MORE fucking off into space than going to Olympia, which is in space)

that was one of the movies of all time

#Monsterdon

I do really like the theme's use of silent measures

it's not sophisticated scoring, but they don't over-use that bit of the theme so it's genuinely novel to hear it

I just kinda like when composition uses silence effectively

#Monsterdon

@miru intermission time, community time  

#Monsterdon #MonsterdonDoubleFeature

Luigi Cozzi making GODZILLA (1977): nobody ever gonna forget the name of Luigi Cozzi. oh! I'm gonna make a movie about it

well, you're not wrong pal, people *are* going to remember this work you're about to excrete onto the market

#Monsterdon #MonsterdonDoubleFeature #Godzilla1977

by the way here was my #MonsterdonBingo card for THE ADVENTURES OF HERCULES. I can probably mark a few more of these but eh, I don't see any justifiable bingo that matches my personal watching experience

#Monsterdon

Dr. Serizawa famously the kind of man who would have an assistant working with him

#Monsterdon #MonsterdonDoubleFeature

"non capisco"

yea me neither pal

#Monsterdon

Watching an Italian Guy's idea of an American Guy watching the events of GOJIRA (1954) and also some snuff footage, the GODZILLA (1977) experience

#Monsterdon #MonsterdonDoubleFeature

okay this is where I admit I haven't seen GODZILLA: KING OF THE MONSTERS! (1956) so some of my disorientation here is the rewriting of the story that is at the core of *this* version of the movie

so some of my "WTF" is really attributable to the American cut of the original film, and some of it lies with Signor Cozzi's reinterpretation of same

"reporter was there" is not a bad way to re-spin a film for a different audience at the time of the original film, and by 1977 Toho was well-aware of the value of their brand, so they had no strong compulsion to sell off the original film, I'm sure

#Monsterdon #MonsterdonDoubleFeature

oxigione destruccione

#Monsterdon #MonsterdonDoubleFeature

the military march part of a Godzilla movie is a hard thing to resist enjoying

it's just such a good theme

#Monsterdon #MonsterdonDoubleFeature

anyway, time for an extended sequence of real wartime sub-hunting footage cut together

#Monsterdon #MonsterdonDoubleFeature

distributors apparently would not touch a movie that was any shorter than 90 minutes, so Cozzi had to pad the runtime of the American cut of the original film

#Monsterdon #MonsterdonDoubleFeature

"he's as tall as a 30-story building"

[cuts to footage of Godzilla next to power lines for a very well-deifned scale reference]

film-making!

#Monsterdon #MonsterdonDoubleFeature

GOJIRA (1954) is such a moving film that even this cough-syrup recut is not able to suppress the chilling power it contains

#Monsterdon #MonsterdonDoubleFeature

cutting in WWII footage does make the failure of the military to respond to Godzilla more prominent

like yea guys, AA into the clouds is not very effective with a kaiju who is decidedly not up in the clouds

#Monsterdon #MonsterdonDoubleFeature