“Here, try one of these!”. Chief Maamau offered me a white blob about the size of a rockworm egg.

“What is it?”

“Food. It’s something I encountered on a planet we crashed on once. They call them Marsh Melons”

I took the blob. It was soft, like a voidbug pupa. I hate voidbugs. “Uhhh”

“They’re better toasted, stick it on this, then hold it near the drive plasma inspection port till it turns brown”

“Is that an OVIPOSITOR reamer?”

“Souvenir. Relax, I sterilized it.”

“Mmmn, that’s good. Got any more?”

#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_Marsh_Melons

“Mmph *nom* *nom* you sure do crash a lot, Chief. Most people get their recipes from the food channel.” #BonusPanel

#Meta #Previously: https://aus.social/@Unixbigot/112039637126947806

Kit Bashir (@[email protected])

“Fork, Fork, Fork, Bronze hair pin, Fork, Tentacle brush, Fork” “Chief, why are we here?” asked trainee spacer Anu, nervously picking at a lump of melted duraplas that had adhered to the sleeve of her coverall during one of the explosions. She’d lost count of how many explosions today. “Do you mean sentient stardust come to life in an uncaring cosmos, or two spacers rummaging through kitchen implements in a junk store on an uncontacted chemical-age class-M planet?” replied chief engineer Maamau. “Fork, Fork” “The second one” “Well, when life gives you meteors, you bake fish in the hot crater. Our meteor smashed through Storage Bay Six before sending shrapnel into the drive room. Cracked the intermix valve, spares of which of course were in that vaporized storage bay, damn the luck. Fork, Fork, no idea, ooh meson orbital manipulator, yes please!” Taking the offered implement with surprise, Anu asked “Boss how can there be tachyon drive parts in a…whatever this place is? This planet doesn’t even have starships.” Antika Maamau winked at her young crewmate. “Old spacers’ trick. No allegedly uncontacted planet has had zero contact. There will be crashes, lost tourists, wildcat traders. Technology diffuses. Cocktail shaker, Flour Sifter, Fuel cock, Egg flip.” “Okay but why are you looking here. This stuff is mostly weird food tools.” “You know how toxins accumulate at the top of a food chain? Well these places are the tech equivalent. The technology that a planet doesn’t understand yet concentrates in junk markets. Fruit peeler. Ew Cetan ovipositor reamer I hope they washed that. AHA intermix valve. Kuria, two to beam up.” “Wait, Chief, I think this planet uses money” #Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot

Aus.Social
@Unixbigot I used to love them too, and then I discovered that the thickening agent was voidbug, and I’m voigan.
@futzle @Unixbigot I didn't know you were from Boston.
@MattHatton @Unixbigot I’m from Joisey.
@futzle @Unixbigot Oh yes. Duh. All you seppos sound the same to me.
@MattHatton @Unixbigot *Disclaimer: New Jersey has many varied accents and the stereotypical diphthongization of /ɝ/ is exhibited in only some of them, notably Jersey City.