When physicists worked out that the speed of light in a vacuum is a fixed limit *UNLESS* a civilisation has completed age verification, a vocal minority complained that there had to be a catch; what—they asked—if verification was some kind of surveillance trap?.
After we verified, the naysayers were briefly smug about having been right.
“Ha, nice tinfoil hat!”
“It’s an umbrella”
“Yawhackinfut?”
“It projects a transverse gravity gradient that deflects raindrops”
“Oooh-kay, let’s presume for the moment you’re sane. It’s sunny out!”
“For now; storm later”
“Did your tinfoil hat tell you that?”
“No, stupid, my weather pixie”
“What can i get you?”
“Guinness Zero, please.”
“A lot of people drinking that now.”
“It’s really good. Uh, so what’s it like working in a documentary bar? Must be quieter than a sports bar and a boxing crowd”
“You’d think. Come back on Friday and watch the Cutting Edge Engineering crowd throw down about the best carbide insert.”
#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #HopePunk #Title_Friday_Crowd
NEW YORK (AP): Shares in Manhattan based SPAV “Ethereal Services LLC”—which last year acquired a number of occult-related businesses including pioneering startup Ghostbusters Inc—have been suspended from trading after the District Court of Appeals upheld a ruling that found the capture and imprisonment of spirits to be a violation of the first, fourth and fifth amendments. ESI’s removal of spirits from the GI containment grid for use in so-called Afterlife Intelligence processors was challenged by a class-action brought by the relatives of deceased persons who claim that the personality of their lost loved ones could be observed in the output of AI data centers. Lawyers for the plaintiff class have called for immediate release of illegally imprisoned VEPs (vital essence persons).
#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_Class_Action
“That’s the same timber you had in the tray yesterday”
“Uh, you must have me mistaken for somebody else”
“I don’t think so. Step out of the vehicle please, I am arresting you on suspicion of operating a double-lane power vehicle without lawful excuse.”
I’ve always treated the modern world like a marvel. I carry an imaginary 15th century peasant in my head, and when I wash a teflon pan, or take an ibuprofen, I experience their appreciation of these everyday miracles. Whenever I use a new piece of technology I mentally explain how it works. If I can’t explain, we should go find out. Sometimes they talk back to me.
Today, in a moment of crisis, they said “I’ve got this; let me drive. Where’s our pitchfork?”
#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_Everyday_Miracles
@Unixbigot @ash rides off fast with the bolt cutters. Nothing can stop me now!
“Wait” the bicycle said.
“Who said that?” the person holding the bolt cutters lowered them.
“My owner is a wizard,” the bicycle continued, “who is tired of losing bicycles.”
“Bicycles don’t talk” Mx bolt-cutter counterfactually replied.
“Speak the words ‘I would like a bicycle’ and you will receive a bicycle”
“Uh, I would like…a bicycle?”
*glingglinggling* “There you go. On your way”
“Uh, thanks I guess”
“Leave the bolt cutters. or else.”
#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_Universal_Bicycle_Income for @ash
I applied that hack which resets your recorded date of birth to 1970-01-01. Now my PC is saying I have been “Selected for Carousel”. Is that like a lottery?
Kit Bashir
Anthony 🇦🇺🦘🐨🪃🌟✨️🕯🧙♀️🏏🧩🎭🪁