My dad and I started watching Once Upon A Time In Northern Ireland today, on his request. We've only seen the first episode, but it's good.

It's very good, actually.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episodes/p0ff7cg0/once-upon-a-time-in-northern-ireland

Once Upon a Time in Northern Ireland

Personal stories of conflict and peace. 25 years on from the end of the Troubles, those who lived through it share intimate, unheard testimonies - and reflect on its legacy.

BBC iPlayer

I appreciate that the BBC left the swearing in. If you can't swear about the Troubles, what the fuck can you swear about?

Besides, telling someone from here not to swear when they talk is like telling them not to blink. You'll only make them uncomfortable and they'll end up doing it anyway.

It's always a bit jarring to me when I see folk complain about bad language online, using phrases like "nobody has to use those words" and "it's always vulgar" and "it sounds uneducated".

Please understand: that is cultural bias.

it's also classist as fuck, imo, but I am told I need to stop turning everything into a class issue

(everything IS a class issue, you can fight me AND the chip on my shoulder)

Every British person does a subconscious class calculation when they meet someone, whether they admit to it or not. You want to know if someone is "like you" so you know how to speak to them and how to relate to them. But I mess up the calculations. I've got too many middle-class indicators now from being highly educated. (That's classism for you!) So swearing is, for me, often a way to reassure someone working-class that we're on the same level and can relate to each other as such.

It's annoying, though. I don't get angry at people much, but a close colleague once tried to joke that the Pulp song Common People was about me, having gotten the impression that my working-class indicators were the pretension, and not the middle-class ones. The idea that I might read as one of those fucking idiots who pretends to be working-class because they think it's "cool" drives me round the bend.

I also feel I need to explain, for Americans and other strange creatures, that class in Britain has absolutely nothing to do with how much money you have. You're born into a class and you're not getting out of it. It's your upbringing and your background and your language and your culture.

Your kids might be of a different class to you. Your grandkids certainly can be. But you're stuck with where you're born, and British society tends not to like it if you pretend otherwise.

Do not take this explanation for approval.

Here is a screenshot which provides an interesting addendum to my posts on British social class.

No, this isn’t parody. It’s the Telegraph.

And yes, that is her real name.

I haven’t read this article because frankly me being exposed to shit like this should be considered a class-based hate crime in itself

also I’m not paying for the Telegraph, lmao

in an absolutely bizarre twist of fate, her relative Drummond Money-Coutts (the heir apparent to the Latymer Barony) has a career as a stage magician.

there's a quote on his website from QEII.

posh people really are just out there doing fucking whatever, aren't they?

https://www.dmcmagic.com/

DMC — Elite Magician and Mentalist in Dubai | Live Magic Performance

Drummond Money-Coutts is a professional magician, illusionist, and mentalist providing live performances in Dubai, Abu Dhabi and across the Gulf region.

Drummond Money-Coutts (DMC)
@astronomerritt
Well, the Quantitative Easing era would be a good time to get a quote from Money-Cooch...

@dlakelan Love that when I did a search for "quantitative easing" one of the top results was actually from the website of the bank Coutts.

https://www.coutts.com/help-centre/investment-faqs/investment-faqs/general/what-is-quantitative-easing.html

What is quantitative easing?

@astronomerritt

It's funny because QEII just gets read immediately as "quantitative easing phase 2" by my internal parser.

@astronomerritt I hope the good people at Davenports and International Magic are taking him for every penny they can when they sell him props.
@astronomerritt At least she's clear that it's acceptable to say "toilet" (???)
@amenonsen oh yeah, that one was keeping me up at night. thank god Money-Coutts is here to set us all straight 😆

@astronomerritt

Ms Money-Cooch should really keep her thoughts to herself.

@dlakelan god, if only, she's a repeat offender
@astronomerritt Money-Coutts. Cash AND a posh bank!
@BenCotterill I genuinely think Miss Money-Stirling from that University Challenge episode of the Young Ones was a direct parody of her family.

@astronomerritt We wondered whether some ancestors got bored of being asked "You're a Coutts? As in the money Coutts?" and decided that it would be easier to just hyphenate that and say "We're the Money-Coutts".

But it turns out that her family were originally "just" the Moneys and they hyphenated the Coutts in as a requirement of a Coutts banker will!

@ibboard That's a shame, I like your explanation loads better!
@astronomerritt Rich British people are wild.
Like, you'd think that comedy TV exaggerates, but nope. Rich British people just be like that

@Artemis201 Posh British people do not live normal lives, and yet, they seem to think that they do. They genuinely don't seem to understand the extent to which the British upper-class is a society entirely divorced from standard reality.

Like, I'm working-class and I can get on fine with middle-class people, they're still relatable, they have lives I can recognise as normal. Meanwhile Money-Coutts is over here thinking what hand you eat a pear with is a burning question that must be cleared up.

@astronomerritt @Artemis201 I think she’s partly performing Posh for pay.

@avirr @Artemis201 Nice alliteration.

And yeah, for sure. She’s essentially rage-bait. But she always sounds so absolutely unhinged that I can’t help making fun of her.

@astronomerritt I want to say she's the same one who wrote the opinion article a while back about how Anne Hidalgo has "ruined" Paris by making it so that rich british tourists can't drive their range rovers around in the city center on shopping holidays, but of course I can't find the article any more
@Tak That absolutely sounds like the sort of nonsense she comes out with. She dwells upon another plane, and I wish she would stay there.
@astronomerritt The concept of “punching up” applies here.
@astronomerritt fuck her, I'm eating a pear with my right hand!

@astronomerritt

Why do large objects and uncomfortable places come to mind?

@astronomerritt : Okay, but also have you thought about shutting the f*ck up?

💋

@javensbukan Nobody in the British upper classes has ever once thought about shutting the fuck up. It’s genetic, maybe.

@astronomerritt

Posh isn't a class. it's just a snobbish side-effect of having more money than any person needs to live comfortably.

@EvilKiru Not in the UK, it isn’t. Posh is what you’re born. You can be posh and poor.

@astronomerritt @EvilKiru there’s a whole genre of English literature about this! The poor aristocrat

I was very confused when I first read about those

@astronomerritt
*(Really really not the point, but) what if I’m in one of those countries where use of the left hand is restricted to toileting and similar “unclean” functions? Do I have to scrub my butt with a pear?
@Gorfram This is clearly the only option. Just make sure it’s a nice smooth one.

@astronomerritt

If The Onion parodied her ( is there any room to even do that ), could they please change her name to Money-Counts?

I'm beautiful, and I think beautiful people should be a protected class. 😂