ickplantFeb 4

Work smarter, not harder

https://lemmy.world/post/42639546

Show threadslaacaa

That’s why my CV looks so strong:

Director of Internal Audit Enron Corp. 1998-2001

Senior Vice President for Risk Management Lehman Brothers 2002-2008

Feb 4 at 10:28amWeb
Show threadsurewhynotlemFeb 4
I see from your resume that you’re good at looking the other way while we make billions. You’re hired.
Show threadjj4211Feb 4
PLEASE
Show threadAgent641Feb 4
Head of security, Wold Trade Centre, NY, 1995-2001.
Show threadrmukFeb 4
Head of QC for O-Ring production, NASA, Jan 1983 - Oct 1986 Pipeline Integrity Officer, Exxon Valdez, Oct 1986 - March 1989 Chief of Security and Intelligence, Alfred P. Murrah Federal Building, Mar 1989 - Apr 1995
Show threadslingstoneFeb 5
  • Head of QC for O-Ring production, NASA, Jan 1983 - Oct 1986

I think you mean you worked for Morton Thiokol if you were in QC. I know, because I was in rocket component procurement at NASA around the same time, and I remember the contract very well for… reasons…

Show threadjubilationtcornponeFeb 4
I see you left that short stint at WorldCom off your resume.
Show threadFrostyTheDooFeb 4
Didn’t you also help found that FTX crypto exchange a few years ago too?
Show threadFluffy Kitty CatFeb 5
I was the lead engineer behind the graphite tips rods at Chernobyl Nuclear Power Plant and I helped Boeing design MCAS for the 737 max
Show threadhperrinFeb 4
Weren’t you also the Lead Safety Engineer at OceanGate for a while?
Show threadslaacaaFeb 4
No, that was at Boeing.
Show threaddejected_warp_coreFeb 4
I just now realized: someone has the most cursed resume on LinkedIn. I’d expect something in line with this.
Show threadhydropticFeb 5

Ohh it’d be hilarious to try and find cursed resumes.

However that would mean signing up for LinkedIn and I’d rather repeatedly hit myself on the head with a hammer. Would lose about the same amount of brain cells