Saul,
Bore da / Good morning; although it obviously isnβt for you.
I am very concerned by the tone of your postings and I think you need to speak to someone who can help you with your depression.
I presume you are in the USA? Please look up the number for the Samaritans in your home state and call them immediately.
Dymuniadau gorau / Best wishes,
Hafren.