Forgiveness allows us to explore and release our long-held beliefs and assumptions about ourselves instead of judging other people. The reward of forgiveness is that it eliminates the trap of unconscious ego gratification that we receive when

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we judge others and gives rise to a deeper experience of self-understanding. When we truly understand ourselves and cultivate compassion for the less-desirable aspects of who we are, it is highly unlikely that our first reaction will be to judge someone else. What we have more of within and for ourselves, we are free to give more of to others."

from Forgiveness by Iyanla Vanzant

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