lcamtuf   Jul 11, 2025

*** Online shopping in 2010 ***

Me: Hello, UnderpantsEmporium.com? I’d like to buy underpants.

Underpants Emporium: Certainly, sir. Your underpants will arrive on Monday.

Me: Thanks.

*** Online shopping in 2025 ***

Me: Hello, UnderpantsEmporium.com? I’d like to buy underpants.

*ding* ShipPirate.biz: Your package is getting shipped!

Me: Wait, who are yo…

*phone vibrates* SMS from 21525: ORDER UPDATE: package is on the move.

*ding* UPS MyChoice: Your package is on the way.

*ding* Underpants Emporium: Your pants-ckage is en route from us to you.

Me: dudes…

*ding* Underpants Emporium: Be sure to review your underpants!

*ding* UPS MyChoice: Your package is out for delivery. Follow it on a live map.

*phone vibrates* SMS from 21525: ORDER UPDATE: package is out for delivery.

*phone vibrates* SMS from +252 3983929301: There was a problem with your shipment. Please claim your package at che4p-pi1lz.virus-basket.biz.ru.

*ding* Underpants Emporium: how’s that review coming along?

*phone vibrates* SMS from 21525: ORDER UPDATE: the eagle has landed.

*ding* Underpants Emporium: customers who bought underpants also bought

Show threadColin Cogle 

@lcamtuf Underpants Emporium: You now have 69 UnderPoints good for $0.69 off you next order of $420 or more. Points expire in the next seven seconds.

Underpants Emporium: in this newsletter, our CEO interviewed himself and the time he wished he had more affordable options for undergarments (click here to browse our clearance stock).

Underpants Emporium: follow us on birdsite for 3% off your next order.

Underpants Empirium: We are writing to inform you that we have been hacked. Someone has your credit card number, plaintext password, and knows you bought the sequined teddy bear boxers. Sorry.

Jul 12, 2025 at 12:45pmWeb