Winged_unicorn🧙🏻‍♀️🌕🔥Jun 23
unpopular opinion time you have been warned.
identies. I've seen people identify with I'm blind. like that's the first part of their identity. excuse me. but why. why is that the first thing you want someone to know. just because we are blind does not mean we need to have that as a primary part of our identity. that is like one of the last things I tell people about me. because there's much more important things to me then my blindness. *shrugs*
Show threadCary ✨Jun 23
@lunar_fang I think there are actually two sides to this coin. While I agree with you that being blind shouldn't define you, there's also nothing wrong with being comfortable in your blindness, and therefore, being ok with telling the world that you're blind. I'm ok with telling the world that I'm blind, because blindness is part of who I am. It's not the whole of who I am, but it's definitely a large part of who I am. and for me, I'm personally comfortable in my blindness. I've been totally blind all my life, and I don't know any differently. So why would I not see that as part of who I am? But I understand that different people see identity differently, and they may not be totally comfortable with their blindness and therefore don't want to display it to the world.
Show threadWinged_unicorn🧙🏻‍♀️🌕🔥Jun 23
@cary5871 it's not that I'm not comfortable with it cary. but it's more of we shouldn't let that define us. we're not blind people who can do amazing things. we're people who just so happen to be blind.
Show threadYourFavoriteAtheist🇨🇦Jun 23
@cary5871 @lunar_fang I agree with that. We are not inspiration porn. And if people don't do for us, in most cases it doesn't get done. That's what I tell people when they say things like I'm so inspiring, I'm their hero, etc. I'm not out to be anyone's hero or inspiration. I live my life the best way I know how. And I get shit done the same way.
Show threadCary ✨Jun 23
@Cam @lunar_fang I disagree. I'm part of a generation where I grew up with 0, absolutely no, access to the outside world, unless I had sighted assistance. I remember having to do research papers in school, and needing sighted assistance the whole way, as far as doing the research, helping me cite the sources, etc. I remember having O&M lessons where I had to learn to walk a mile and a half from my high school to my deaf and blind school where I lived. I didn't have a cell phone, and I couldn't magically tap a button and summon a car to my location. In my opinion, the things that blind people can do now are amazing. Especially with the advent of AI, blind people can be more independent now than ever. I don't have to ask a sighted person if the can I'm holding is chicken noodle soup, I can pull up an app on my phone and ask the app. That is an amazing thing to me. You obviously have a right to your opinion and I respect it, but I'm comfortable enough with my blindness that I don't care if I tell the world I'm blind or not. there are many facets to my identity, blindness is but one of many. I'm also a sexual abuse survivor, and I'm married, and I'm a christian, etc, but I'm comfortable enough with who I am that I don't mind sharing those things with people, either. My point is that we identify with many things that shape us and mold us into being who we are, why not be comfortable enough with who you are to say hey, this is part of who I am, and I embrace it. You, Ashley, are pagan. It's part of who you are, and you're not afraid to embrace that, but paganism is just one facet of your identity. Why is it ok to embrace your paganism but not your blindness?
Show threadWes DerbyJun 23
@cary5871 @lunar_fang See, I don't see it as her not embracing it...She's just not making that the sole focus of who she is...And often, when you identify as blind first, that's all many sighted/abled people see...Blindness. They don't see a talented, interesting person with many things to offer in a friendship or relationship. Usually, if someone identifies as blind first, I've found they really don't have a lot of other cool facets to their personality, or they don't display them. Blindness becomes tiehr identity.
Show threadCary ✨Jun 23
@countrymetalhead @lunar_fang I'm definitely not saying it should be the first, number 1, facet of her identity, by no means. But in my opinion, being unwilling to embrace it as part of the whole is unhealthy, and unrealistic. *shrug*
Show threadTech SingerJun 23
@cary5871 @countrymetalhead @lunar_fang I'm not sure what you mean by "embrace it". I mean I don't embrace the fact that I'm bad at math, or that I'm fat, or that I like mysteries, or that I enjoy history. These things are facts. I have never really known what to do with language like "embrace" something, it's always come off to me as therapy language, which doesn't really mean much like "process" or "sit with", or "make space for". It's metaphorical language but I don't see the value of the meta for. Anyhow, however that may be, and again this is probably because I have never seen so don't really understand, I don't get the point of embracing it, I don't really know what that means. It just is, and I have to deal with the things it brings into my life. I don't think it's that interesting, honestly. I always remember Joseph Mitchell when he was talking to a deaf guy who was explaining communication and he said "that's interesting". The deaf guy, who was, I'm sure, a bit annoyed, said "it may be interesting for you, but not for me", or something like that. I keep repeating that "it just is", and I'm sorry to do that, but I'm not sure what else to say about it. As I said, I would happily change it if I could, but since I can't, I've just got to deal with it and the serious issues it causes.
Show threadCary ✨
@techsinger @countrymetalhead @lunar_fang I guess when I say embrace it, I just mean to be ok with, to be accepting of, to not be resistant to, your blindness. Because you're right, it's not like you can change it anyway, so rather than being upset or depressed or sad about it, accept it as part of who you are and be ok with that. *shrug*
Jun 23 at 11:55pmWeb
Show threadTech SingerJun 24
@cary5871 @countrymetalhead @lunar_fang I suppose I do that, after all, what's being sad or resistant or not accepting it going to get me? I mean I am often sad and annoyed about, as well as not accepting, the artificial barriers which are constantly put up. I suppose I should also be sad about the missing beauties, the sunset/paintings/physical beauty of people, but I can't work up too much emotion about that because I don't really know what they are, though I'm sure they're wonderful. I accept it because I don't have much of a choice. I have seen quite a few people put themselves, or their kids, through one version of hell trying to get some sight, and I am deeply sorry for their suffering, though they obviously think it's worth it. I am particularly sorry for those who go through the hell and end up where they were before. For an adult, that is a tragedy, and for a child, it's just unspeakable. Having said all that, if embracing it is being okay with it, then I don't do that, it's a horrible thing, why would anyone be okay with it? Blindness is by no means the worst thing that can happen to a person, it's usually physical, rather than mental or spiritual, for one thing, but it's really bad. Accepting it, though... what else is there to do? Thanks for the definition of embrace, I get what people are saying now and I appreciate your taking the time.
Show threadCary ✨Jun 24
@techsinger @countrymetalhead @lunar_fang yes, you're absolutely right, and those people who have a hard time with accepting their blindness are sometimes those who have issues with allowing their blindness to be part of who they are. I'm obviously generalizing, and I know there are always exceptions to the rule, but I've seen so many people who just can't come to terms with their blindness, and most usually those are the ones who have a hard time embracing it as part of who they are.