This #Pride month, I don't want cishet people to change their profile to pride themed, or post about how they want queer people to feel safe around them.
I want them to be unbearable to people espousing casual prejudice around them. To call out sexist, homophobic, racist, transphobic comments, especially when framed as a "joke". To say this is unacceptable to their faces.
Keeping the peace is a privilege for those unharmed by the status quo. Raise hell instead.
@ellesaurus we don't need a specific month for this.
We all should be making the bigots feel like shit 24/7/365. It's not even that hard to do - just be a good person and it should happen naturally.
@ellesaurus
A great way to shut down disguting "jokes" is to just make them explain it to you. Say you don't get it and ask why it's funny.
They'll either say the quiet part out loud for everyone to hear or they'll clam up really quick.
@standev As draeath@social.sdf.org said, it should be easy. However in practice, it's not the same when the perpetrators are your friends, family, coworkers. The go along to get along crowd. There's a lot of avoidance of serious matters in social situations.
So for most it is hard. It can be uncomfortable for everyone. It can sour relationships. That's why it's the valuable work. Doing what's right, even if there are consequences for you, because minorities don't get the option to ignore it.
@standev Since I'm generally talking about people with social capital, I don't think that's at issue.
It's just people don't do this. They don't like to be confrontational, and frankly, just don't care that much.
Moral stands is a very simple demonstration. Chik Fil E could not survive only on the backs of bigots.
In the same way people will just not worry about that kind of thing, they won't push back against comments about too much queer content or myriad others things short of a slur.
@standev If targeting the trans community meant targeting the entire queer community; and targeting the queer community meant targeting all minorities; and targeting all minorities meant targeting all "allies" we'd operate with enormous power.
I've seen multiple "allies" in just the past year taking vacation trips to Florida. Florida's tourism was hit by Covid, but not by their trans-hostile policies. A unified coalition would actually make those policies have a real cost to the state.
@ellesaurus 100%
I think it's really important for folks to consider how humor can be a tool for trying to enforce social norms, even in a small group. And rejecting that tactic is important. Humor is a super important social behavior and shouldn't be trivialized or dismissed.
Passage from Meyer, J. C. (2000). Humor as a Double-Edged Sword: Four Functions of Humor in Communication.
@ellesaurus I've been repeatedly told "you seem angry" over the last few weeks for doing exactly this, so I think its working. People think I'm an asshole already. Might as well use that privilege for good.
Happy Pride! β€οΈβ
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