I def have perfectionism tendencies and what fucks me up is that most of the advice around it focuses on fear-based perfectionism, mine is more based around aspiration. I want to make things that are timeless, perfect, up to my own standards. Totally separate problem that I'm still exploring rn.

I think I figured it out

at least for me, I keep thinking that standards are a way of earning some kind of recognition or invitation into some inner circle; the reality is that you probably can already find that within your existing circle