#monsterdon MONSTER ZAP! Not sure what that bright blue light was, exactly, but I'm sure it has something to do with The Beast™ attacking and interrupting the royal marriage.

Oh hey, those ominous soldiers clad in glossy black pointy armour can also just scale castle walls as if weightless? Uhhh and when stabbed they break apart like garthim from The Dark Crystal? OK, sure, got it.

#monsterdon This protracted mountain climbing sequence could have been a swift montage.

*mountaineering boy-king's internal monologue* The hiiiiiills are aliiiiive / with the sound of muuuuusic

ALTERNATE CUT:

Lissa needs braces! / Dental plan / Lissa needs braces! / Dental plan / ...

#monsterdon boy king: *holds up the glaive, as if to throw it at... nothing? Like, off the edge of the mountain?*

old man: Do not use it until you need it!

We need to have a talk about the value of practice and the virtues of muscle memory.

#monsterdon "You heard the man, we're a army now!"

_muttering_ "An unpaid army."

"Have you got a problem?"

"What, can't a man even talk to himself without being interrupted now?"

Heh, legitimately funny

#monsterdon "You cannot overcome the power of the beast..?"

"Not in this place, no."

"Then where?"

"The emerald tower."

One short day / In the emerald city..!

#monsterdon "He gave his life for us."

"He... was my only family."

"We're your family now!"

ooooooof, it's not called an emotional beat because it's supposed to feel like being hit with a stick

#monsterdon Oh for pete's sake, are we about to have a giant spider scene? I could really do without one of those, please and thank you. (Nev don't read this toot.)

edit; YEP THOSE SURE ARE SOME STOP MOTION PEDIPALPS. Right then, I'll just be behind the couch for a little while, see you all again soon.

#monsterdon *horses gallop by in a herd*

_extremely Laura Dern voice_ They do move in herds!

(Are these the fire mares that were coincidentally mentioned in the last scene? Is there a reason they are not apparently fiery in any particularly obvious way?)

#monsterdon *fire mares gallop straight off a cliff and into the sky* ah OK so now we're in full E.T. / "why don't the eagles just fly them to Mordor" territory

Really missed an opportunity to license Ghost Riders in the Sky for this scene

#monsterdon ...cyclops dude is blaster-proof..?

Sure why not

I guess it's narratively convenient, definitely doesn't completely invalidate the emotional beat of the previous scene where the merry band left him to die at the place and time he foresaw for his end.

...and it's all just so he can be stone-ground to cyclops peanut butter in this scene?!? Good lord, what a mess.