... I was a printer?
@[email protected] Are you an evil printer that won't print any black and white when cyan is out?
@hannah I will definitely print black!
@[email protected] Then yes! You'd already more benevolent than 99.9% of all other printers out there! ​​
@yassie_j I know almost nobody who still has a printer, except for myself.

I will pat you gently and feed you paper jam
@lucretia @yassie_j hi i have a canon inkjet that has adhd (it sometimes just stops printing in the middle of a page and spits out a half printed page and then cancels the job)
@yassie_j yes as long as you're not made by hp
@[email protected] yes if you're a laser or dot matrix printer, no if inkjet :3
@yassie_j i will commit war crimes against you if you turned into an HP printer
@[email protected] what brand of printer?
@atom whatever you think
@[email protected] if brother printers are the non-shit ones and you were a brother printer then i would still love you (platonically)
@yassie_j that’s a hard sell ngl
@yassie_j I love how we’re all of one mind about HP printers.  

So, yeah, if you turn out to be that β€” hard pass.
Otherwise sure, you’d get premium paper and case pats.