If anyone attempts to argue with me about text expansion and how I could perform this far more efficiently with semicolon expansion or simply by using Keyboard Maestro, I will cry and become very sad, plus there's a non-zero chance that I will directly impugn your social skills, tone awareness, and general civic compass on a platform where several of your internet friends will see it and know I'm talking specifically about you.

So, don't let’s argue about text expansion.

Man, I got up fucking *early* today.

It feels like nine thirty.

@hotdogsladies

But that efficiency score!

@maletero

I swear to God: Chatty G gave me better CPAP settings!