I spent a few hours out having lunch with mum earlier.

I found myself thinking after - as I bundled in my safe spot on the couch under a #weightedBlanket, with a #plushie, top-up #ADHD meds, something soothing on the TV to nap to - 'I miss when I could go out for a thing and not be fucking spoonless after.'

And then I thought: 'when was that, me? When has that ever been true?'

The answer is, it probably hasn't. I just got used to pushing past my limits because I was 'supposed to be able to'.