I have an oddly relevant story.

My wife and I got to do a “swimming with a capybara” experience. My wife forgot about the instructions to not wear anything dangly because the capybara may play with it.

Well, she wore a bikini top that had a big bow in the front.

That capybara motorboated my wife like he was Vince Vaughn after a dry spell.

I just turned to the other (horrified) guests, shrugged, and said I didn’t blame him.