What’s it like to suddenly lose hearing in one ear, you ask? The other ear works fine, right?
First, it’s a hidden disability. Nobody notices, unless I tell them, which can feel awkward and embarrassing. Took me a long time to get over that.
With only one ear, I’ve lost all ability to detect where sound is coming from.
That means I can’t filter out background noise. I can have a perfectly normal conversation in a quiet environment. But if there’s background noise it gets hard rapidly. 1/n

So I won’t be able to hear you in busy restaurants, urban streets, anywhere with background music, crowds, parties, or anywhere where several people are talking at once.
Teaching is now really difficult. We’ve installed air purifiers in all our classrooms, but they make enough of a hum that I can’t hear the students very well. I like to use a lot of breakout discussion in my classes, but I can’t hear anything any of them are saying if I do that.
2/n

It’s hard to find quiet restaurants, although I’ve discovered if you eat earlier in the evening it tends to be quieter. But why do they all need background music? Most wont even turn it down when I ask.
Academic conferences are particularly hard. The talks are fine. The rest is not. For me, the value of a conference is in the informal conversations in coffee breaks, and over lunch or dinner. I can’t do that now.
3/n

The first conference I went to after my hearing loss, I signed up for the banquet, and sat with a group of people whose work I really wanted to hear about. There was a live band playing throughout the meal. I couldn’t even hear the person next to me who was talking into my good ear. And I couldn’t explain why I was being so antisocial.
I left halfway through and walked back to my hotel in tears.
Ironically I’d been to a panel session earlier that day about making the field more accessible…
4/n

So I’ve learned a lot about dealing with a hidden disability. Nobody notices your disability unless you tell them, which is usually socially awkward.
Then they’ll make all sorts of wrong assumptions about it.
Some then make a fuss over it, which can be even more embarrassing.
Some get more embarrassed themselves as if it’s their fault I can’t hear them.
I understand these reactions - they’re meant well.
But they don’t help.
It’s best just to ask me if I need any accommodations.
5/n

BTW one small thing you can do to help. Download the SoundPrint app, and use it to take a noise measurement every time you visit a restaurant. Together we can build a useful crowdsourced map of restaurant noisiness.