My story with Luna

This is a story of what I've had to live through for the past 7 months. I know it's long, but please read it. At this point @cyan and I just want the abuse to stop and to be left alone.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1W2Vvwg0rwSVb5r4TQ_NmAF8SxIXAHPGEZnELgwS36yE/edit

Update 9 months later: Luna did not stop her abuse, instead she escalated it. Part 2: https://vt.social/@lina/114453525309759623

My story with Luna (LunaFoxgirlVT)

TW: Attempted suicide, self-harm, emotional and mental abuse, gaslighting My story with Luna Twitter: @LunaFoxgirlVT | Bluesky: @lunafoxgirlvt.foxgirls.gay This document was first written and kept private in June 2024, after Luna had repeatedly accused me of being an abuser to my friends and som...

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Asahi Lina / 朝日リナ // The Yellow Cyan Nyan ✨ (@LinaAsahi) on X

My story with Luna This is a story of what I've had to live through for the past 7 months. I know it's long, but please read it. At this point @CyanNyan6 and I just want the abuse to stop and to be left alone. https://t.co/9yeatht6AY

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@joshix There's a lot of traffic to the document at the moment, so drive's doing some automated self-protection stuff, which may be causing that? It worked fine for me, albeit in a "reduced preview mode" due to that.
@becomethewaifu wtf? Why can't google handle that? They are fucking google.
@joshix Most of google's scalability magic is horizontal, in that they can have ungodly amounts of different docs being edited at once, but the architecture doesn't scale that well for an individual document. (tens of thousands of servers running drive doesn't do squat when every user who wants that specific document has to bang on the same set of three to get a copy...)
@lina @cyan That's a lot. I hope the two of you are able to be happy and left alone, and all involved can get better.
@lina @cyan I've read it all since I was quite... shocked to hear someone would try to smear dirt on you.
Even as someone who dealt with many abusers, I have no words to describe Luna's behaviour. That being said:

- Showing no respect for boundaries
- Becoming more and more attached despite clear signs from other person they don't like it
- Trying to demonize you for alleged "betrayal"
- Blaming you for her decline in mental health despite lengths you went to help her
- Weaponizing her mental health/suicidal thoughts to grasp power over your actions via guilt
- Doxxing and misgendering you (hypocrisy much?)
- Possibly more, less apparent red flags

Makes it clear who needed help in this scenario, and who refused it multiple times. Feel free to throw rocks at me, that's just my personal take.

I'm sorry you two have to go trough this 
@elly thank you very much for summarising 27 pages!
@cyan @lina 🩷

@lina @cyan What about those "mildly inflammatory messages criticizing Asahi Linux, nijilive (the Inochi2D fork), and VT Social itself" messages? If they were truly made, then there should be some evidence for them? In the current state, it's a nothingburger, especially after hearing Luna's side of the story.

Also I've seen ableists trying to invalidate female autistic individuals by claiming "it's BPD, autism is a "boy's disease", and you look nothing like my low functioning second cousin".

@lina @cyan Sending hugs to the two of you, along with hot beverages, Croissants and Pains au Chocolat.
@lina @cyan This is… just bad.
Sorry you had to go through this. I hope things get better for you.

@lina @cyan I didn't want to see that...

But this is not surprise, the constant self-pitying and self-harm warning while \@everyone-ing on inochi2d's annoucement channel already gave BPD away.

I hope she gets the medical help she needs and that you guys can recover and move on.

@lina @cyan Had no idea this hell was happening in the background while all the fantastic Asahi work was going on... Wish you both the best.

@lina jfc that's awful 😕 you're a deeply knowledgeable and passionate person, and a gracious host. i guess through a lens of extreme insecurity that might seem overwhelming or intimidating, but that's just not at all a fair characterization. when we chanced to meet you went out of your way to be inclusive and entertaining, help me find gifts and food at weird hours, find my way home safely, and i still cherish those memories

i do hope you get some space to breathe and heal

@lina @cyan as someone who also went through a lot of BS in the past few years due to my people not respecting my boundaries and being thankless about it later, I can… deeply resonate with parts of this document

sorry this happened to you, and hang in there! hugs

@lina @cyan Aw, this is unfortunate and awful you had to get through this, hope Luna will get some help, and that these events will be behind you

Personally, I was hoping to make a visual novel using Inochi2D to make character posing a bit easier, more automated, and hopefully more dynamic, and I knew integration with Ren'Py was a goal once the major rewrite was done, so I grew disheartened over time with development stalling with Luna's health as everyone else was waiting after that rewrite, so it's nice to see there's other people working on a fork

Do you know if integration with Ren'Py still a goal with the fork? In any case I'll definitely check this out :)
@Yuki @cyan I don't know what the status of that is, you'd have to ask seagetch! I think he might be busy with buildsystem stuff and core feature improvements right now, but I'm sure he'd accept contributions around integration too if someone works on it ^^
@Yuki @cyan Honestly part of the issue with Inochi2D is just that... Luna is kind of hostile to contributors and doesn't allow them any agency. She wants to maintain full control but she doesn't have the bandwidth herself to really push it forward. So things stall... I'd sort of given up on it really taking off a while back due to this, but I didn't expect things to get so bad that someone else would fork.
@lina @cyan Yeah, definitely, if I remember seagetch was a contributor towards the end, at least for the 0.8 branch while Luna was working on a 0.9, but you could feel he still had his hands tied, so I kind of understand him forking it will give him more leeway into pushing this forward

Also Ren'Py Tom seemed really interested working on this on the Ren'Py side but there was depedencies which made it hard to integrate until the rewrite was done, and of course, that was for Luna to figure it out
@Yuki @cyan TBH I think the rewrite is a red herring. The whole idea of Inochi2D was always that it was supposed to be a reference implementation, not *the* canonical implementation. There is already an Inox2D Rust rewrite that is much more suitable for embedding into other projects, and Rust is already more likely to be familiar with people for building in dependencies. But Luna decided to stick with D for everything somehow at some point, and now she's trying to refactor the whole reference D implementation into something that everyone will share and... I just don't think it's going to work.
@lina @cyan Oh, yeah, that was the problem, D isn't easy to work with, and the C bindings needed to work with pretty much every other language under the sun are absolutely lacking, also you were kind of forced to work with whatever renderer the reference implementation used which isn't ideal if you already have a renderer (like Ren'Py)

So as a result it was better rewriting the whole thing if you want to work with it in your project, which still isn't an easy thing to do
@lina @cyan really awful that you and Cyan had to go through that. very manipulative behavior on Luna's part, i hope she is able to get the help she needs and move on...
@lina @cyan this is all so much... I'm sorry y'all had to go through this, hopefully yall can live in peace
@lina Christ, this is beyond rough. I hope you'll get some of that peace you both deserve.

@lina Wha, had absolutely no idea all this was happening. Soru woshed the best to you & cyan, and hopes you'll have somepeaceful, quiet days soon 💚

For Luna, soru hopes you can find professional help and get better! 💚

@lina @cyan As an autistic critter I can also confirm that was not a meltdown. It may be autistic burnout mixed with something else. I don't think autism alone can really explain it.

I wish you two all the best, I hope you can leave all that behind.

I also wish her to find the help she needs. You all deserve to heal in peace, I hope she will understand that. 

@lina @cyan it honestly hurts reading all of this, can't imagine living through all of it.

I hope things get better for you both from now on
@lina @cyan why do queer spaces have to generate so much trauma all the time…? I really hope luna moves on and improves, for her own sake, and everyone else’s who was involved.  hugs from austria. Things will get better, never lose hope.
@lina @cyan thank you for sharing, wishing you and Cyan the best given the circumstances.
@lina @cyan I'm at a loss of words. Best wishes, and all the support.
@lina @cyan if i may ask, who is "marcan"? i've seen their name tossed around a lot
@lunanova @lina @cyan that would be Hector Martin, lead of the Asahi Linux project.
@lina @cyan We don't know each other but I followed you for a while now to see the updates of your work on Asahi Linux.
I didn't know you and your girlfriend had to go through that. I'm very sorry for both of you and hope you can both heal and find your peace again. Hang in there! :)
@lina @cyan Took me a while to read the whole document. I'm shocked, and also very sad to see such level of serious drama that has been going on. I only hope everything will turn for the better for all. Best wishes and serenity for all.
@lina @cyan First of all, I want to thank you for all that you did to attemt to help her. I hope that you can now move on and not have this hanging over your heads all the time.
@cyan @lina What an awful situation to go through, unfortunately I can somewhat relate as I used to have a friend that had issues respecting boundaries... Big respect to you for speaking out about it, and I truly hope you and Cyan can have peace.
@lina @cyan so sorry you had to go through this. I probably can’t say anything you haven’t heard by now, but I wish all the best for both of you
@lina @cyan i'm sorry this has happened to both of you. hope cyan is getting used to japan well
@lina @cyan This was a long and sad story. I hope Luna seeks out professional help.
I wish you all three the best.

Hope to see you and cyan stream soon again.