I temporarily conducted an orchestra for a month while the conductor was ill. When he passed away I said I couldn't take over full time, so the orchestra disbanded.

In May I quit the community orchestra I'd been conducting for nearly two years, causing them to disband too. It was initially because of the few members turning up to rehearsal but now the relief of not having to do it and all the preparation involved, has made me realise I don't particularly like conducting.

Now I've had another orchestra ask if I'll be musical director (for the second time) because the current one wants to retire. This one's big and well established, 70+ members.

I'm going to say no, because while everyone seems to think I'm good at it, I don't enjoy it, especially the amount of work that goes into it when not doing the actual conducting.

Am I becoming the killer of local orchestras by not wanting to do something that I'm apparently pretty good at, but don't enjoy?

@beccabadger Nope.

'Plz do something you don't like so X thing can continue' is bullshit. It's asking you to sacrifice happiness for a community that can clearly just go out and find someone else.

If another conductor doesn't exist, it's time for them to foster new ones.

@DarkestKale I will be saying no, as much as it pains me as a recovering people pleaser.

You would think finding conductors around here would be easy, being near quite a large town with a well known professional orchestra, but apparently not.

@beccabadger
is it not easy, or have they not reallllly looked because they know you're around?
@DarkestKale It's highly possible. They've asked me before and I said no then too, I'm trying to make sure I phrase this response as "no, never" rather than "not now, maybe later".

@beccabadger contention: A conductor is to an orchestra what a GM is to a roleplaying group.

Ask Nick how a Forever GM should disengage from an rpg group :)

@beccabadger 'Conducting and playing an instrument are, while they occupy the same space, two different hobbies and I have conclusively proven to myself that I prefer the latter to the former and no longer wish to be a conductor'
@DarkestKale That's an excellent way of putting it, thank you.

@beccabadger Cheers!

I've written the same post for people over on r/rpg... a lot.

Heh.

@DarkestKale Yes I imagine that like you say, it's pretty similar! And similarly difficult to get out of once you're in.