0000000000000000000Can you describe in the simplest way possible, what is romantic love? What's does it feel?
Love is just something that happens to you. You don’t get to understand it.
Having a romance makes you an expert on love the same way getting hit by a car makes you a mechanic.
butterflies in the stomach
It’s just oxytocin…
There’s no deep spiritual meaning/feeling.
Just oxytocin, dopamine, and some other shit.
Because of human variation, no two people will experience it exactly the same
That seems a solid argument. Biochemistry inside the human body regulates other “human states” and “love” shouldn’t be different.
I mean. That wasn’t an argument, that’s what happens
It’s all hormones and neurotransmitters, and we can get accustomed to it. Then when we dont get it, our body’s don’t like it.
A broken heart is just going thru withdraw.
A rebound is just not quitting cold turkey.
I’m expressing myself only because I’m well aware your description won’t be accepted by everyone since many give the human state of “in love” spiritual and even religious connotations.
I cant say you’re wrong, but it feels over simplified.
Like if you had learned that water evaporates into the air and when there’s too much, it rains, and then said that’s it. That’s all rain is. You wouldn’t be wrong, but you’re leaving out all the other factors like air pressure, warm and cold fronts, and the muthafuckin Coriolis effect!
Yes, it’s brain chemicals, but there’s also past trauma, core memories, and the muthafuckin Coriolis effect scrambling up those brain chemicals and turning them into brain hurricanes and hailstorms.
Hat doesn’t really explain how it feels though.
Because of human variation, no two people will experience it exactly the same
Because it’s incredibly subjective.
I don’t disagree with you about how it functions but would you say that differentiates romantic love from love for family or a pet for example?
Yeah, theres lots of different kinds, English just uses one word because English is (by and large) a shit language.
The Greeks had like 5 or 6 different words, English just uses adjectives which is just as functional.
However language changes the way we think. And English being so lazy like this leads to people “rediscovering” shit over and over.
On a biological level, yeah, different things get different levels of different things.
It’s a constant cocktail of shit, so different things hit different, even just randomly sometimes for no reason
TeknikalThe closest I came was just pure trust, yeah you guessed it she cheated on me. I still think it’s probably just being able to trust someone completely unfortunately that one probably wrecked me for life.
Don’t get me wrong I’ve had a lot of girlfriends etc since just have never trusted any of them and that’s probably what ruins things.
I don’t remember posting this…wait, that’s not my username…OH MY GOD, THEY’RE INSIDE MY BRAIN!!!
It’s different for everyone, but if someone gets in your head in a way that the first thing you think when you enjoy something is that you’d enjoy it even more if they were there to share it with you, to quote the big pizza pie, that’s amore! Or rather, it’s romantic feelings that are fertile ground for full blown love to grow from.
From there it’s all about how your emotions feel to you.
When someone else’s happiness is requisite for your own.
Hmmm, my best attempt at describing it is, to feel sad or upset in some way, if you could never see or interact with that person again. And if just being in the presence of someone is comforting in and of itself. I understand that’s not the in the moment feeling, it’s very hard to describe that, although there are ways to try, chemically, personally, anecdotally, etc. And I would say one way is not wrong over the other. But I like the retrospective approach of if I would be genuinely sad or upset if this person was snapped out of existence. If I feel like something profound has been lost if I were to no longer interact with that person. Then I know there’s real love for that person.
Romance is when you meet someone who makes you want to cross lines you don't usually cross with others. Sex is the really common one, of course, but I'd argue it's all the rest of the emotional and social stuff that makes it *romance*. Sometimes it's exciting, sometimes it's scary, sometimes it's really warm and comforting. But what makes it a romantic relationship rather then just a friendship is that feeling of wanting to cross a line that you wouldn't cross with anybody else.
Call me Lenny/LeniIt feels like the other person was made for you, you just feel it with their vibes.
When you have been with someone for a long time it can feel a lot like family bond love but with more physical and emotional intimacy. Not everyone likes the idea of it in my culture but I think there is also an element of willing possession too.
sgibson5150I defer to John Cameron Mitchell. Enjoy.
Origin of Love, Hedwig & the Angry Inch, Full Uncut HD
That’s a song.
Well spotted.
Like breathing for the first time.
ComradeSharkfuckerThat can’t be right. Mr Freeze isn’t a villain. He’s just a loving scientist, who wants to save his wife from a disease that won’t let her be outside of freezing tempatures. But he still LOVES her.
You’re goddamn right
“Dangerous”
You get one taste of it, feel it in your stomach, the pure elation, and can’t go back to how it was before. So many, if not most, instances of romantic feelings end in heartbreak. You may even be in a situation where you intellectually know it will end in heartbreak. And you know this, but you pursue it anyway.
I have a really hard time understanding my feelings. With a couple of romantic partners, I feel myself becoming happier when I’m with them. When they walk into the room, I get a little burst of oxytocin.
I don’t think I understood what it was in all instances.
Weirdly, I didn’t always feel at ease with them.
Like others have said: it varies from person to person. I haven’t felt the prosaic emotions other commenters described.
And, of course, it changes with time.
Night at the Roxbury intensifies
To me, romantic love is a deep sense of care and companionship for someone. You care deeply about their feelings, safety, happiness, and life. You also deeply long to be with them. That’s not always possibly, and when you’re not with them for extended periods, you miss them.
Romantic love is something that takes time to grow, usually out of infatuation. In other words, you can be head over heels for someone but not really be romantically in love with them.
Lastly, it’s something you want to continue. If you find yourself not wanting a relationship to continue, chances are it’s not love. (It could be, and you could just know that you’re not right for them.)
That’s my take, anyway.
It feels like the person you desire has hijacked your thoughts in the best way possible.
BoofStrokeA mental disorder.
I'm back on my BS 🤪The official term is trauma bond.
Describing a feeling is never an exact science :)
The common metaphor is “butterflies in your belly”.
Baby don’t hurt me, don’t hurt me, no more.
we all knew it
Vladislav!
At first, rapid heart rate, feeling unreasonably nervous to see them then overjoyed when you do. Happy to just gaze at them for hours or getting lost in their eyes.
Sometimes that dulls a bit with time (sometimes not) and is supplemented by feeling connected to them always and wanting to include them in your life. Wanting to do anything to make them smile and make them feel seen. And feeling seen yourself.
Like a hot shower - comforting and warm, but also sometimes a bit painful. Relaxing, but also still has ‘work’ involved.
Shadow_ZwiebelBrain -> off