Alice McFlurry 
You can try to distract me with a woman wearing a shirt with a boob cutout and not one but TWO bucket hats, but your shoes will always be ugly, skechers.
timoth‽@Alice As far as I'm concerned, there's only two things you need to know about Sketchers: 1) They are the only company I have found who offered a purple slip-on in my size, and 2) They have discontinued the aforementioned purple slip-on in my size.