FanChats💬submit your prompts!It's trope discussion Monday! What do you think about non-sexual kink in fics? What makes it work for you? Can you recommend a good fic featuring non-sexual kink? 
westie@FandomChats I LOVE NONSEXUAL KINK! Both incorporated into a larger plot and in kinky oneshots, it's really fun to read a fic where the ~titillating action~ is centered on *different* kinds of sensations and intimacy. I think I might go make a rec list now actually. 😊
tei@westie @FandomChats please!!!! 🥺
@FandomChats I love it and can never find enough! I think it's a little hard to define because if you ask for recs for it people tend to assume you don't want any sort of sexual or romantic feelings or expressions between the characters, which is not really the case for me-- a lot of the time I just feel that if the focus of the story is kink, making them have sex after can feel like relegating the kink to the status of foreplay in a way I find alienating.
Anyway here's an MCU fic: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20285635 and an Old Guard kink club AU: https://archiveofourown.org/works/34193203
aaaand I can't not mention the scene in ch. 6 of Blackbird which I've like memorized every word of or something https://archiveofourown.org/works/1881783/chapters/4549608
ska@FandomChats @bloodripelives this is super interesting and puts a finger on something that bothers me abt some depictions of kink-as-foreplay to some main course, i feel like I’ve misunderstood what people in this context mean by nonsexual kink in fic/art or that there’s two distinct uses in play — scenes of kink without sex in play as the ultimate goal, vs. scenes of kink where the erotics of kink are elided in-story? But I don’t know how I’d define that, in practice.
@bloodripelives @FandomChats (also lmaoooo erotics what am I talking about… basically all the ways desire and its satisfaction are in play within a kink context that don’t necessarily involve orthodox genital contact or locating the events in a linear progression from Least Meaningful to Most Meaningful (which in practice is so often defined as Penetrative Sex)
@skazka @FandomChats YEAH no and i think this an important definition because. I would struggle to come up with a concept of "non-sexual" kink that was not erotic. or at least, to come up with an example of non-erotic kink writing that I have enjoyed. And I don't know if that lines up with, for instance, what sex-repulsed people might be looking for when looking for stories in which "non-sexual" activities take place.
Med@FandomChats I love it! It's something about the focus on sensations/feelings that don't inherently lead to sex that does it for me. We need more, really.
emilies to lovers@FandomChats I love it, wish it were easier to find. This chengqing improvised D/s and self-bondage fic is really good https://archiveofourown.org/works/30861230
@FandomChats I wrote something recently that technically counts but the kink content is very very brief https://archiveofourown.org/works/54713407
Similarly to what others have said, I'm often unsure whether something "counts" as non-sexual kink because I've heard mixed things vis a vis whether it's still non-sexual kink if the characters are aroused and getting sexual gratification even if no one comes or has their genitals touched etc. I find "characters doing kink stuff that is erotic but getting off in the present moment is not the point of the interaction right now" easier to grasp and to write than characters doing kink where the charge/appeal is entirely nonsexual/gratifying on a different level, though I enjoy reading and writing that as well... But I don't want to engage in false advertising if someone is looking for the latter and I'm writing the former.
@FandomChats however I am looking for a specific fic... It's tgcf, hualian modern au with a wulian flavour, calamity-esq xie lian is a nonsexual dom at a kink club, hc (who is quite young and inexperienced) becomes obsessed with him and wants to sub for him, they have a twisted little relationship, bai wuxiang shows up at one point impersonating xl and messes with hc's brain (xl and bwx both being masked all the time). No one ever actually fucks. It was very good and if anyone remembers and can link me I would appreesh
@FandomChats shoutouts to ladyfish for locating this gem https://archiveofourown.org/works/38045110
@roland @FandomChats oh my godddd......
@bloodripelives @FandomChats one thing I really admire about MXTX's couples is how you can write domestic fluff or extremely unsafe lifestyle bdsm and it's all workable. Darling they have the range
@roland @FandomChats k I have no idea who these people are or what is wrong with them (lots) but this fucked so hard (no-fuck edition)
villainous friend@roland ahhhh love this one 🥰
Soph (they/them)@FandomChats love it!! though tbh sometimes the things that appeal to me on a kink level are Not the same as what appeals to me on a sexual level in a story, so to me whether the kink content is there for me is unrelated to whether or not it's sexual lol.
but also: I just really enjoy stories where characters find ways to be intimate that are personal to them, instead of following standard narratives of How relationships go, and sometimes getting nonsexual kink content in there is one way to accomplish that
also, on another level, something I remember reading meta about in the kink_bingo event on dw is about stories that have an "erotic focus" on a kinky thing even if the characters themselves aren't Doing A Kink and I can really enjoy that too!
I just like when stories are INTERESTED in a thing and then just GO FOR IT on the thing it's doing!
....I will try to come back later with some recs
@soph_sol @FandomChats dakfjhga I know exactly the one you mean and almost posted it in this thread 😂 so. https://kink-bingo.dreamwidth.org/478674.html there we go
@bloodripelives @FandomChats yes! that's the one! I remember it being really good and interesting, and helpful for framing my thoughts on the topic!
@FandomChats RIGHT SO obviously my number one nonsexual kink rec is the fic with ling wen nonsexually domming pei ming which bloodletter wrote for me: https://archiveofourown.org/works/54713407
it is perfect and genius and everything to me
and I enjoyed this series of one-shot fics set in a modern au where the unclean realm is a bdsm club. sex does happen but the fic focuses a lot more than the average on kink without sex https://archiveofourown.org/series/1759510
but overall.....I haven't actually done a good job over the years of bookmarking kinxtual stories as such so it's harder for me to pull up recs for!
Ocean Blorbocean@FandomChats I don’t really know any but if anyone has f/f recs for this can I have it pretty please
gnocchi@FandomChats ‘*Kink: a sexual desire or practice regarded as unusual or unconventional’*
I think non-sexual kink would be *sensual* experiences that’re considered unusual or unconventional to mainstream society. otherwise they’re just normal interests? there’s a difference between non-sexual pet play and being really into collecting lego. intercourse-free kink is still sexual kink!
side note: while testing examples against this definition, I’ve discovered something™ about myself 
Laura 🏴☠️🏳️🌈@FandomChats I often find them really refreshing to read! "A Little Restraint" by @fyre immediately came to mind, my no. 1 comfort fic right now. 💜 At least I *think* guys tying each other up to find a deep sense of calm & comfort fits the description? :D
Mo on raccoon@FandomChats I adore all manners of rating in kinky fanworks, including non-sexual ones.
I am going to emphasis the "fanworks" part here because it's easier for me to explain my approach of this concept with non-fic examples. "Hand porn" collection of screencaps of hands is easily a non-sexual hand kink, same as "food kink" series of Miyazaki movies gifs of glistening, delicious looking food. "Competency kink" was a big thing in Stargate Atlantis fandom era.
(1/?)
@FandomChats (2/?)
Did everyone use the term kink/porn in the same way for these? No. Overused terms? Maybe. My point here is how these absolutely framed non-sexual things *for the characters* in titilating ways *for the viewer*. Turned a magnifying lens on specific casual acts, regrouped them to add focus, edited them for a more intense effect.
As many have rightfully pointed out, kink can be anything. Many are experiences that have particular sensorial meaning for someone within context.
@FandomChats (3/?) There are several aspects of hurt/comfort that cuddle with kink for me, depending on the lens. Does the camera linger on the bondage, is the character reflecting on the faith and trust of rescue, are expected tropes focused on in a way to provide strong emotional and sensory reactions to characters or audience?
Tentacles are something commonly perceived as kink suggestive independantly of whether they are used as kink props or not, whether there's sex or not.
Some recs
Person Of Interest (TV): Stitch My Skin Together (Thread the Needle with Your Love) by Isagel
https://archiveofourown.org/works/16633199
Summary: John allows himself to get hurt on purpose so Harold will patch him up
Rec notes: M/M, 8K words. The fic contain sex but the sex is another expression of the featured need/kink, not the expected result of foreplay. I have no canon knowledge and enjoyed this. John is some kind of kickass special agent. Harold is his handler. Has an great podfic!
Rozzychan@FandomChats
I think what makes it kink is the intensity of the emotion, for example most of us love eating, but some Really love eating to the point that they pick up a strawberry and you tell them to " get a room".
I like competency kink where someone does something very well and I'm on the floor slobbering.
I recently saw a ballet competition, and was getting some real balletkink / dancekink but that's almost impossible to pull off in a written work. If you see any, send it my way. ;)