Mastodawn

So much of getting old is like Hey you know that part of your body that you barely gave any thought to? Now it's the only thing you can think about.

I don't need this existential crisis at 10 in the morning.

@theropologist my jerk kidney is laughing at this, while I cry.

@theropologist are you talking about peroneal calf muscles or sesamoid bones or frozen shoulder or what I can’t keep up.

@theropologist I'm actually screaming, I only look like I'm laughing.

@theropologist Damn straight!!

@theropologist *nods* Things malfunctioned on my body that I didn't even know existed. Meibomian glands? Now you're just making shit up.

@theropologist It's horrifying how much of my attention is directed towards digestive systems.

@theropologist Spleen! Gall bladder! I didn't even know my galls NEEDED bladding!

@theropologist You can't live without a spinal cord, son. Nothing unnatural about that.

@theropologist Three years ago I’d never heard of Frozen Shoulder. Now, after two years of physiotherapy, my shoulders are 99% back to normal.