just had one of the most intense flashbacks I've ever had

my #ptsd is killing me

one #traumaversary of mine is less than a month away

Abe

the last guy that raped me

he choked me nearly to death

he forced me to go down on him, then held my head down as hard as he could, so hard it hurt, and held me like that until I started to pass out from suffocation

after he stopped he slapped me to the ground and came on my face, then slapped me again

somehow through all of this, he kept convincing himself I secretly enjoyed it

he even had the audacity to text me asking if I had fun

sorry for dumping all this here, but I don't have a therapist right now