@nixCraft SCENE: North Pole Server Room. Some SOFTWARE ELVES are here.

SRE (SITE RELIABILITY ELF): Uhhh, the database server CPU just spiked.
DBA ELF: Someone trying to run last year's delivery reports?
SRE: No. (*sighs deeply*) The Big S is doing a SELECT * again. On the entire contacts DB, which just passed 8 billion this year.