You know what, I dislike all the fake outrage about those of us who criticize men or say stuff like “I hate men” as a shorthand or in a weak moment.

These phrases and attitudes are born from generations of trauma inflicted upon them by the majority of men. When my girlfriend is at work, she is infantilized and talked over, reassigned from important projects, denied sick leave, denied promotions, talked down to, underpaid and constantly told it’s a “myth”. So she organizes her workplace - and every time she wants to speak or take responsibility in her union, someone else pipes up with a louder voice and overrides all of her judgements for some reason. When she finally arrives at the doctor’s, she gets misdiagnosed and told that she is probably just hormonal. When she walks around, she gets harassed by men: whether it’s classic catcalling, physical harassment, or things like “hey my friend thinks hes an alpha would you fuck him? hey where are you going? can i come with you?”. Finally, my girlfriend just wants to relax and hops on a video game; and there gets harassed the entire time through, screamed at, hurled slurs at, being told that she’s bad and should uninstall the game, that she likes cock up her ass, that she should go back to the kitchen. And even if it’s not about her gender, it’s literally all a competition among men, talking shit, telling each other to kill oneself, shit talking others’ skills, laughing at each other and hurling slurs. When she is eventually depressed about the state of the game and the game not being fun if everyone is toxic, she is told to toughen up because “we’re just taking shit at each other lol”.

Meanwhile, if she plays with women or the rare non-toxic guy, none of that is a problem, they congratulate each other, give constructive feedback and say good luck, have fun, good game.

Can you imagine how it is to go through that every single day? No matter if you’re sick or pissed or depressed? To try and relax in a fun game of Valorant after a super frustrating work day, and immediately being screamed at by a rabid male teenager who very obviously just thinks that insulting others makes him more likeable and “alpha”? Every time you want to relax?

And it’s so transparent. These guys are literally just so insecure about being vulnerable that in their own fear of their own weaknesses they try and eradicate weakness and happiness and emotion in others, because it threatens their world view that happiness and manliness can only exist when you’re perpetually “alpha”: angry, solitary, unemotional, unempathetic. These men are literally simply pathetically easy to see through, and drag everyone else down with their own sorrow.

And when they final sigh in exasperation and one time among friends half-joke about hating men (although she clearly only means typical men espousing toxic masculinity), then suddenly all the white knights come from the basement and cry about how it’s unfaaaaair, and how she is the real sexist here, and how all of this cannot be true because THEY would never be mean to a woman, and THEY surely have never seen any of that happening, and SHE must be overly sensitive.

Of course you then end up thinking “if men disappeared overnight the world would literally be so much better” if your everyday life is constantly defined by insecure, angry, aggressive, verbally and physically abusive men. Crass example, but would you blame a Polish kid in 1943 for being slightly miffed at Germans and being all “I hate Germans”? Would you tell the child that they’re the real fascist and should clarify that not all Germans are nazis? The Redditors probably would. Normal people wouldn’t.

This whole entire “boo hoo you’re so mean against men” thing can literally only come from people who sit on their ass on their couch all day, have to think about their gender exactly 0% of the time, and then are mildly annoyed by an online comment of someone claiming to be done with men.

OF COURSE men are not all evil. There’s super cool men around! Yes, men are victims of patriarchy, and all of this “vulnerability equals weak and undesirable” is a product of patriarchy; but a vast majority are despite that still willing to bully, harass, rape, assault, scream, devalue, infantilize, hate. They’re not animals incapable of critical thought, they could stop those things at any moment, but choose not to, out of some “facts over feelings” bullshit.

And it truly does not mean all men, it’s not an excuse. At all. I cherish every single cool and chill man I have in my life (and I have many, including my boyfriends), and they all know that they are not meant when people complain about “men”; the “men” in “I hate men” refers to “typical men” and “men who act like men are conditioned to act”, not every single man in existence. But policing victims’ language is not the solution here, and just makes people come across as really, really unempathetic.

Policing victim’s language in those cases just really has a lot of “but why didn’t the 12 year old Palestinian child distance themselves from Hamas before being bombed” energy.

As a man who is basically dead inside, probably, in the long run, due to men. I tend to use the phrase “I hate people” not because I’m avoiding the whole thing of saying I hate men or I hate women but people generally suck. All of the reasons you have listed above apply to people as a whole.

I’m not defending the opposing side of your argument because I fully understand it, women probably do face those things in large proportions due to men, but I have been told, in the grand scheme of things, probably an equal number of times to man up or grow a pair by men and women alike. When I say I’m dead inside, I don’t physically know how to display any actual emotion, (anger and humour are the 2 most prominent if you count humour as an emotion) so simply by voicing something that I don’t like or making a complaint is enough for people to think I’m not being manly enough.

I still have a circle of people I care about and I’m almost sure they care about me but I would still say I hate people.

I tend to use the phrase “I hate people” not because I’m avoiding the whole thing of saying I hate men or I hate women but people generally suck. All of the reasons you have listed above apply to people as a whole.

“All Lives Matter”

So you didn’t even bother reading the whole reply. You’re part of the problem.

I did, the rest is typical misanthropist nihilist Redditor drivel.

And after sharing my experiences, you wonder why I might be that way. You argue for the reasoning why some women say they hate men and as soon as someone says women aren’t all angels you get defensive. Look in the mirror, the patriarchy you hate, you’re part of it.

“And as soon as some concerned® white guy says that not all blacks are innocent you get all defensive. You’re the real racist. Look in the mirror.”

“I hate men” and “I hate women” are not comparable. One is kicking upwards in desperation, the other is kicking downwards in hatred.

Only if you look down on women, I don’t. Maybe you should have a little more respect for women.

Look up the difference between equality and equity in a dictionary. I pointed out that kicking down on a mostly oppressed minority is bad, and that kicking upwards at an established class of mostly oppressors is excusable due to context.

People like you always want to rip things from the context because pretending that women and men are entirely “equal game” obscures their power in the discourse, makes it easier to silence them.

Ripping it from the context? This post was about how men rarely receive the support they may well need and you turn up bashing men and playing the victim card.

Where’s the context?

You’re clearly too oppressed that you can’t even accept someone else’s experiences. Have the life you deserve, you waste of resources.

Ah there the mask goes off. Now women fighting sexism are “playing the victim card”. Right out of the neo-nazi playbook. George Floyd probably also deserved it, the suffragettes were whiny bitches, blah blah blah. Christ, I can’t wait for your generation to die out.

And here comes the “make shit up about them to make them seem evil” play. You know nothing about me, including the generation I’m from. What a joke