I want to talk about Women's Pain. I've never had "good" periods, not since I was a teenager, but as I aged they got worse and worse. I was basically bedridden three days out of the month, and popping ibuprofen for a while after that too. I even got a prescription for Marijuana, because I knew the ibuprofen wasn't good for my stomach, and I needed something to ease the pain. Despite all of this, I just assumed that this was what it was like for most women.

I've always had a lot of anxiety about doctors, but it had ramped up since childhood. My Mom has been in and out of hospitals her whole life, and has had some pretty traumatic experiences. I watched my Dad die in an ER in front of me. But my best friend died suddenly of a preventable illness, and I decided I had to do better, regular Doctor visits was the top of the list, since I had only been going when I absolutely needed to. I casually mentioned to the doctor increased pain during periods and he (like a very good doctor) ordered an ultrasound just in case. This started months and months of tests and doctor visits, 4 ultrasounds, birth control pills that made me sick, an MRI, two different specialists, one of which let me know that I was a mess inside, but I would need surgery to find out exactly how, basically a nightmare. I was so ready to be done with it that when they said surgery I said Yes, immediately, I was so ready to be done. My surgeon was fantastic, but basically said they wouldn't know what the end result was be until they were in there could be just cyst removal, could be a total hysterectomy. In the end, they had to remove my right fallopian tube, right ovary, and some cysts, they also put in a Mirena IUD. I had endometriosis for years, and didn't realize it.

I tell this story, because in a way, I was lucky, my doctor believed me about my pain, but there are thousands more stories where Women's pain gets ignored by the medical establishment, they tell them they are just stressed and hysterical. The average endometriosis diagnosis takes about 7 years, because of this. Men get better care than women, period, and if you're a woman of color or LGBTQ, watch out, the stats are even worse for you. Men get treatment and pain management far more often and far quicker than women. And to top it all off, women are just told pain is normal and part of life from the time they are small children, your period will hurt, so will sex, pregnancy, menopause. We are expected to live in and accept pain our whole lives. Women don't have a higher pain tolerance than men, we are just expected to grin and bear it in a way Men simply are not.

So, final message, if something feels wrong, don't wait, go to the doctor, don't take no for an answer, if your doctor denies you, get another doctor. You know your body better than any other person, you deserve the best care for it, love yourself!

If you have any other advice for women, and dealing with the medical establishment, or just want to share a story, please feel free!