Mastodawn

The Right-Wing Internet Is Full Of Wild Theories About A Text Message From FEMA

https://lemm.ee/post/10340541

The Right-Wing Internet Is Full Of Wild Theories About A Text Message From FEMA - lemm.ee

Why fear an automated text message? The reasons are mind-bendingly ludicrous, but surf long-running waves of disinformation around 5G networks, the COVID vaccines, and a nefarious federal government intent on harming its citizens. “These tests and exercises or drills, if you prefer, are always preceding of, or simultaneous with, an actual created crisis,” the Hawaii-based pastor J.D. Farag said in a recent sermon, clips of which spread on X and TikTok. “The crisis is first simulated and then created,” said Farag, who has nearly 300,000 subscribers on his “End Times news and global events” YouTube page, before comparing the impending event to the Sept. 11 attacks and COVID-19. Jason Shurka, a spirituality influencer with around 170,000 followers each on YouTube and Instagram, warned followers in videos last month that an emergency broadcast, “disguised as a test,” would send a high-frequency signal to devices across the country “with the intention of activating graphene oxide and other nanoparticles that have been inserted into billions of human beings around the world through the obvious mediums,” presumably a reference to the COVID-19 vaccine. On Truth Social, the Trump-backed social media network, one QAnon influencer noted the emergency test coincided with rumored nuclear evacuation drills in Russia and warned, “You and your body have been continuously assaulted by every poison, bioagent, medication, and criminal warfare device (millimeter, x-rays, and microwaves) conceivable, for your entire lives.” And on TikTok, one since-removed video included the caption, “Y’all get ready. October 4th their [sic] activating Marburg virus through 5 g signal which they are activating on October 4. This will affect anyone who took the shots.” The accompanying video featured anti-vaccine activist Todd Callender warning that a 5G broadcast would cause “liquid nanoparticles to swell” and release heretofore contained pathogens into the bodies of COVID-19 vaccine recipients, causing “a Marburg epidemic” as well as, really, a race of human zombies. (The Marburg virus is a dangerous hemorrhagic fever virus.)

PeepinGoodArgs Oct 4, 2023

And on TikTok, one since-removed video included the caption, “Y’all get ready. October 4th their [sic] activating Marburg virus through 5 g signal which they are activating on October 4. This will affect anyone who took the shots.” The accompanying video featured anti-vaccine activist Todd Callender warning that a 5G broadcast would cause “liquid nanoparticles to swell” and release heretofore contained pathogens into the bodies of COVID-19 vaccine recipients, causing “a Marburg epidemic” as well as, really, a race of human zombies. (The Marburg virus is a dangerous hemorrhagic fever virus.)

Oh, that’ll be easy to disprove when I eat their face because human flesh is a rare delicacy, not because I’m a zombie. They’ll be so mad, I bet.

LrdThndr Oct 4, 2023

Worst zombie apocalypse ever.

“Sorry, too busy bleeding from my eyeballs to bite your face. By the way, can you hand me my lung please? I’d bend over to get it myself but then my colon would fall out.”

Boddhisatva Oct 4, 2023

Hmmm, if I weren’t so lazy I would try and start a counter theory that the nanobots/Marburg Virus/graphine oxide particles are on a 3-year timer by default and if your phone doesn’t go off today and reset their timer, then they will automatically deliver their payload which will turn you into a liberal zombie hunting for MAGA supporters to consume with expensive fancy mustards.

Sabata11792 Oct 4, 2023

Any one feel like eating a vegan all of the sudden?

CADmonkey Oct 4, 2023

I mean, if she’s willing…

givesomefucks Oct 4, 2023

These people are so fucking stupid.

They think a cellphone has the ability to “activate vaccines and give people Marbug virus”, but for some reason think if they turn their phone off to not get the message, that’s the only time the signal could be sent out?

Cherry on top:

I saw a different article about this where the nut jobs were telling people to mask up because chemtrails are going to happen at the same time. Also something about drones that send out the signal?

There’s just never any logic with them

kibiz0r Oct 4, 2023

Unfortunately, I think they’re fucking unwell.

Opportunist media on the right hypes them up and “yes-and”s their paranoia.

Opportunist media on the center-left makes fun of them and then moves along.

Real message should be that we need universal health care, including pschiatry.

fubo Oct 4, 2023

There’s a lot of undiagnosed (and self-medicated) anxiety disorders out there, and right-wing conspiracism gleefully feeds on it.

thesprongler Oct 4, 2023

These are people that claim the vaccine injects tracking devices into us, while tweeting (truthing?) from their location-activated cell phones. So logic isn’t exactly their strong suit.

BluJay320 Oct 4, 2023

Oh so NOW they think masks work

Mario_Dies.wav Oct 4, 2023

I’m so glad I quit my last job so I don’t have to get brain cancer listening to these conspiracies discussed in earnest from my christofascist manager and her bootlicking sidekick

18-24-61-B-17-17-4 Oct 4, 2023

Good gravy.

Objectionist Oct 4, 2023

bad gravy!

these guys ruined it cause they probably aren’t smart enough to make it correctly

AnUnusualRelic Oct 4, 2023

I know this is a worldwide phenomenon, but I’ve never met a live one over here (non US). How common are those lunatics over there?

TipRing Oct 4, 2023

There are several people in my office of ~50 people who called in sick or are trying to avoid phones today.

cm0002 Oct 4, 2023

You should get everyone to start acting sick and weird lolol

“Bob it’s so strange I’m not feeling so well all of a sudden”

“All of a sudden Bob you started…smelling delicious”

Lmao

qprimed Oct 4, 2023

while this asinine conspiracy crap is over the top, there is at least one reason to be aware of the EBS test… specifically for people that may be hiding a phone - for many legit reasons, including a domestic violence situation. making sure the phone is completely powered off (and will not alert) for the test may prevent a nasty domestic encounter. that is all.

The Picard Maneuver Oct 4, 2023

A bunch of people who snuck phones into live performances, rehabs, and prisons are about to have an interesting day.

toasteecup Oct 4, 2023

What’s that ringing nose? It’s coming from your ass?

TheYear2525 Oct 4, 2023

Snape: What is that mysterious ringing noise?

ferret Oct 4, 2023

Again, just power the phone off and there is no issue

darth_helmet Oct 4, 2023

I bet you a good 50% of people don’t know how to power off an iPhone anymore

Ænima Oct 5, 2023

It’s the same way you turn off anything, by dropping it in the toilet!

ezures Oct 5, 2023

what, you guys don’t store yours in the toilet tank?

Ænima Oct 5, 2023

Just the burner.

Hackerman_uwu Oct 4, 2023

I’m not going to ask why you thought of this but I want to say you’re a good egg for raising it here.

One love.

thesprongler Oct 4, 2023

The alarm went off on my iPhone work phone, but not my personal Android. I got the pop-up on both and keep them both on silent.

qprimed Oct 4, 2023

yeah, the likely only surefire way is to not be connected to the cellular network (phone off).

android (and ios, I imagine) have options buried rather deep in settings to ignore alerts, but who knows how consistently well they work or are retained after an update.

givesomefucks Oct 4, 2023

You can opt out of some of this stuff.

I know Amber Alerts can be silenced or disabled from Android, maybe you disabled these as well?

I know there’s a good intention, but when they go off every driver on the road gets a crazy alert blaring at them, I’ve often wondered how often those actually help and how many accidents they cause.

【J】【u】【s】【t】【Z】Oct 4, 2023

They are very helpful. They are only issued when there is a danger to the child and they have a description and license plate of the suspect vehicle. An amber alert indicates a hot pursuit, and what to try on these in that moment is for regular people to have their eyes open.

givesomefucks Oct 4, 2023

No, I understand their intended purpose…

I’m doubting their efficacy and curious about how much harm they cause.

Like, if everytime you heard a knock at your door, you’d shoot thru it with a shotgun. You’d 100% hit every burglar that was polite enough to wait by the door. It is effective.

The downside you’d also shoot everyone else that knocks on your door.

In this analogy it’s the consequences of every driver on a crowded interstate having the alert go off and quickly fumbling their phones to shut it off. All the people driving by schools and playgrounds, or just have their own children in the car going down a winding road.

Then them taking the time to read the text. While still driving, because if they wait till they stop driving… We lose the main reason for sending them.

I wouldnt be surprised if the number of people who have died from car crashes is greater than the number of children who have been found due to an Amber Alert.

But maybe I’m wrong, I just said I’d be curious to see what the numbers backed up.

【J】【u】【s】【t】【Z】Oct 5, 2023

Ohhh I get you. Damn, that might be true.

That’s our cat and mouse crime strategy.

hedgehog Oct 4, 2023

If you want to disable it on your iPhone, it’s at the very bottom of Settings -> Notifications (under all the apps). You can disable:

AMBER Alerts
Emergency Alerts
Emergency Alerts - Always Play Sound
Public Safety Alerts
Test Alerts

Did you have Emergency Alerts enabled but have “Emergency Alerts - Always Play Sound” disabled? If not, I’m curious if anyone who did can report about whether or not it was effective.

oehm Oct 4, 2023

Even entertaining this theory for a second longer than I really want to, why in these people’s minds would the US government want to destroy itself by turning its citizens into zombies?

cedarmesa Oct 4, 2023

Theres your problem. Thinking one layer deep. You need a lobotomy to get any insight into these folks thinking.

fubo Oct 4, 2023

Because in this mythology, the Democrats are demonic entities who desire evil for the sake of evil.

Rapidcreek Oct 4, 2023

I’ll be getting a vaccine about that time, so I’m looking forward to it.

lolcatnip Oct 4, 2023

a nefarious federal government intent on harming its citizens

That part isn’t crazy for them. It’s what they vote for every time they’re given the chance.

whygohomie Oct 4, 2023

It’s literally the point of the southern strategy: hurting your fellow Americans (and yourself) for the lulz/racism/economic anxiety/owning the libs/etc.

WHYAREWEALLCAPS Oct 4, 2023

I, for one, welcome our new zombie overlords.

postmateDumbass Oct 4, 2023

Transdimensional cephlopod zombie overlords.

Funbreaker [she/her]Oct 4, 2023

Nitpick but the EBS was renamed to EAS ages ago

Jerkface Oct 4, 2023

warning: obnoxious

Funbreaker [she/her]Oct 4, 2023

sadge. Honestly the homebrewed attention signals back before the EBS and EAS stuff were truly standardized were hilarious.

flossdaily Oct 4, 2023

Yeah… They’re fucking morons.

jordanlund Oct 4, 2023

I love these morons… “I’m an open heart surgery survivor and I’ve had the Phizer and Moderna vaccines like 5 times now? 6 times? Need to check my vaccine card… No problems, no Covid either.”

Lazylazycat Oct 4, 2023

I mean, we had a similar test in the UK ages ago so surely they realise this hasn’t affected vaccinated people?.. What do they think it’s going to do, exactly?

Phoenixz Oct 4, 2023

It must be great being a cult leader. You can make all sorts of ridiculous claims. Every once in w while you’re right and you can go “SEE!? SEEEEE!? I WAS RIGHT, I AM YOUR GOD!” and for the other 99.999% of the times that you’re wrong, you can just claim some other ridiculous reason which then also will be believed.

xenomor Oct 4, 2023

I heard that this is Biden’s Order 66, and it’s going to activate the antifa super-soldiers and turn all frogs gay.

TechyDad Oct 4, 2023

I heard that this is Biden’s Order 66,

And it worked too. You don’t see any Jedi walking around, do you?

Gobeans Oct 4, 2023

Lisa, I’d like to buy your rock!

dylanmorgan Oct 4, 2023

Man, I remember growing up in the 80s where we had a test of the emergency broadcast system every month, and like clockwork there was a manufactured crisis. The 80s were wild.

kescusay Oct 4, 2023

Remember when they had the aliens abduct us all? The anal probes were fun.

TechyDad Oct 4, 2023

I still remember my third grade teacher showing The Day After to our class. For anyone who doesn’t know, that was a TV movie about nuclear war that was extremely graphic for the time. Grown adults had trouble watching it and my teacher showed it to us third graders.

For weeks afterwards, I thought that any plane flying overhead was a nuclear missile that was going to kill us all.

Ah, the 80’s!

paddirn Oct 4, 2023

“That’s how they’re activating the sleeper cells, the ones who got programmed with the 5G virus, they’re all gonna get activated at the same time yo come take our guns away and rape our grandmas, and institute Biden’s Fifth Reich!”

CharlesDarwin Oct 4, 2023

This and Jade Helm is coming for the ReelMuricans’ precious bodily fluids. This, plus masks and the vaccines.

yiliu Oct 4, 2023

Guys, this is a golden opportunity!

Get on Right wing forums and tell them this test has been aborted, because all the clever paranoid nutjobs were onto them.

But, in fact, the test has just been rescheduled to a random time, or rather at random times for the next year or so. Until Biden’s time is up and Trump is declared Supreme Emperor I guess. Because really, if you were really conspiring to send a mind control message, you wouldn’t broadcast the date & time ffs.

So the only safe thing to do is to turn off their devices, all their devices, and leave them off until after the next election. That includes TVs, of course, and especially Fox News, cuz the Democrats know that Fox News viewers are more cautious and took fewer vaccines, so they’ll have scheduled extra Emergency Broadcasts for them.

Fast forward a year, in which all the crazies have to go out and live on the real world and talk to real people, and we might just have a sane country back. At the very least, we’d have a year off…

ShaggySnacks Oct 4, 2023

This is a genius plan.

Potatos_are_not_friends Oct 4, 2023

I’m sad that I didn’t get any of these from people I know.

I blocked a lot of people during the covid scare. And was hoping to prune the list even more.

CharlesDarwin Oct 4, 2023

Just went off. Nothing happened. Another dumb right wing thing put to bed.