What's a skill that's taken for granted where you live, but is often missing in people moving there from abroad?
https://kyu.de/post/1055442
What's a skill that's taken for granted where you live, but is often missing in people moving there from abroad? - kyu
I was thinking about that when I was dropping my 6 year old off at some hobbies
earlier - it’s pretty much expected to have learned how to ride a bicycle before
starting school, and it massively expands the area you can go to by yourself.
When she went to school by bicycle she can easily make a detour via a shop to
spend some pocket money before coming home, while by foot that’d be rather time
consuming. Quite a lot of friends from outside of Europe either can’t ride a
bicycle, or were learning it as adult after moving here, though.
Just misunderstanding social cues. Where I live (Spain), there’s a script you’re supposed to follow for certain things and newcomers, understandably, don’t understand the script. One famous example is buying new clothes. They all look great on. The idea here is that the poor person spent their hard-earned money on the new clothes. Damned right they look great on! Another would be birthdays celebrated in public venues. Perhaps someone you know is celebrating their birthday in a public venue and you had no idea they were celebrating their birthday on that day. You walk up to them and wish them a happy birthday, BUT you were not invited to this celebration. Since you weren’t invited you did not come prepared with a present for the birthday person. The safe thing to do is to ignore, socialize with the people you came with, and make like that person isn’t even there until they approach YOU. When and if they approach you, you make pretend you’re all distracted and you have to be like, “Ahhh! I didn’t see you! What’s up?” The reason: that person is buying all the invitees the drinks and food. In exchange, the invitees have brought presents. It’s a very nuanced and weird situation all of us have encountered. We err on the fear of not having brought a present because we had no idea because we were not invited.
The birthday thing fascinates me because it’s the exact opposite of how you would handle it in the US. Here you would wish them a happy birthday and then move on since you weren’t invited.
In the USA, the birthday thing is the best thing about the USA. It’s all about being selfless (I’m American btw, been living in Spain for so long I’m a citizen) and it’s actually something that creates conflict in interpersonal relationships between natives of Spain and the friends they make that are not from here. It is a huge drama that somebody needs to make a documentary film about now. This birthday thing has no age. It could be a 20th birthday or a 100th birthday. You ain’t invited, you didn’t know, you didn’t bring the presents, you just keep to yourself in the public venue. It’s harsh. It’s harsh because you were excluded and you don’t care, because you’re American, you just want to be nice and wish them a happy birthday. Spanish people are all nope on that shit. It’s all about the presents and who bought you the drinks and food.