I have seen some tomfuckery in my time, but this one is absolutely baffling.

#Excel

@Rhodium103 I'll admit that looks weird, however the reason for running the Python in the cloud is so that a Python payload can't maliciously access resources on your computer, install malware, or otherwise pose a security risk to your assets. Like most security issues, it is a trade-off.
@VisualStuart
@Rhodium103 Is it possible to choose the cloud provider in this case? Or not? And is it possible to self-host the python cloud provider?
@Genstar @Rhodium103 It seems like you are looking for xlwings instead.
https://www.xlwings.org/

xlwings is an open source package that allows you to automate Excel with Python on Windows and macOS. Write Excel macros and UDFs in Python.

Automate Excel with Python (Open Source and Free)