Scott BaroloNov 21, 2022

Re-posting this 🐤 thread from 2018 which, sadly, is still relevant:

#WomenInSTEM who talk about #harassment and sexual misconduct get a lot of antagonistic & unhelpful replies.
@shrewshrew and I (a woman & a man in science) tried to categorize them. #9ReplyGuys

THE NINE TYPES OF REPLY GUYS 🧵

#1: THE LIFE COACH

Show threadScott BaroloNov 21, 2022

#9ReplyGuys: a 2018 twitter thread by me and @shrewshrew

Reply Guy #2: THE TONE POLICE

Show threadScott BaroloNov 21, 2022

#9ReplyGuys: a 2018 twitter thread by me and @shrewshrew

Reply Guy #3: THE GASLIGHTER

Show threadScott BaroloNov 22, 2022

#9ReplyGuys: a 2018 🐤 thread by @shrewshrew and me

Reply Guy #4: THE COOKIE MANSTER

Show threadScott BaroloNov 22, 2022
If you mention #9ReplyGuys elsewhere please cite @shrewshrew, my 50/50 writing partner on this project (which probably means she did way more than half and I didn’t notice)
Show threadScott BaroloNov 22, 2022

#9ReplyGuys: a 2018 🐤 thread by @shrewshrew and me

Reply Guy #5: HIMPATHY
(term coined by Kate Manne)

Show threadScott BaroloNov 22, 2022

#9ReplyGuys: a 2018 🐤 thread by @shrewshrew and me

Reply Guy #6: THE SEA LION 🦭
aka Just Asking Questions (JAQass)

The term #sealioning was inspired by a 2014 Wondermark comic: wondermark.com/1k62/

Show threadScott BaroloNov 22, 2022
More about #sealioning: here’s that Wondermark comic by David Malki
wondermark.com/1k62/
Show threadScott BaroloNov 23, 2022

#9ReplyGuys: a 2018 🐤 thread by @shrewshrew and me

Reply Guy #7: THE MANSPLAINER
(no shortage of these on Mastodon)

Show threadScott BaroloNov 23, 2022
I will post #9ReplyGuys #8 and #9 soon!
In the meantime here’s one of the great moments in the history of #mansplaining: a man mansplains mansplaining on Twitter.
(The original flowchart he’s trying to refute is by Kim Gordon.)
Show threadScott BaroloNov 23, 2022

#9ReplyGuys: a 2018 🐤 thread by @shrewshrew and me

Reply Guy #8: THE PRESTIGE

Show threadScott BaroloNov 24, 2022

#9ReplyGuys: a 2018 🐤 thread by @shrewshrew and me

Reply Guy #9: TROLLS, CREEPS and FOOLS

Show threadScott BaroloNov 24, 2022
The idea behind #9ReplyGuys is that, if you wish, you can use the 9 images in the thread above to quickly categorize & dismiss sexist replies. Misogynists *hate* being called unoriginal.
Thanks from me and @shrewshrew for your support, suggestions, boosts and encouragement 💕
Show threadScott BaroloNov 24, 2022
[note: if you want to see more details about each of these guys, with a graphic showing examples of each type of response, scroll up in the thread! 👆]
Show threadScott BaroloDec 13, 2022

Honestly a lot of the people on here need to learn basic reply etiquette. Mastodon is becoming known as the home of the smug mansplaining tone-policing reply.

A lot of white people feel way too comfortable here and post our unexamined unfiltered reactions without considering how annoying and exclusionary we’re being.

If you’re typing something “helpful” and the person you’re replying to didn’t ask for help or doesn’t follow you, the most helpful thing you can do is hit Cancel and move on.

Show threadScott BaroloDec 14, 2022
ooh, this one touched a nerve. you’re calling yourselves out in the replies, defending your god given right to be annoying creeps lmao
Show threadScott BaroloDec 14, 2022
it might possibly say something about Mastodon that in the entire #9ReplyGuys thread above (concerning misogyny) there was not a single negative reply, but as soon as obnoxious behavior from white people is mentioned, suddenly feelings got hurt
Show threadAethelstanAug 22, 2023
@sbarolo so. I with you except — I can’t help being a white guy. It’s how I came out.
Can we use some other descriptor for the bozos you mention? Thanks.
Show threadMariAug 22, 2023

@Aethelstan @sbarolo

I understand where you're coming from, at least with being white. I'm not a dick just cuz of my skin color.

But I've learned by listening that a lot of other white people assume I've got more credibility than non-white people regardless of our actual skills. And I've learned through experience that men get that same automatic belief.

Your privilege doesn't make you bad. It means your actions can have outsize effects on others.

Show threadMari

@Aethelstan @sbarolo

And more directly, saying "white guy" is not an insult.

If white people are the ones making other people uncomfortable, we are the people who need to be addressed.

If men are the ones making other people uncomfortable, they are the ones who need to be addressed.

If all of that makes you uncomfortable, you should consider why that makes you uncomfortable.

Aug 22, 2023 at 5:14pmWeb
Show threadAethelstanAug 22, 2023
@margoose @sbarolo
I’m saying the broad brush is not helpful at getting the message across — it is off putting to “allies”. And — we can do better (see matrix). :)