I think it's easy to imagine "the community" as this Big Powerful Organized Thing that owes us understanding and support. Why did the contest not provide ASL interpretation? Why didn't someone welcome me on my first night at the bar and introduce me to everyone? How could Springfield Leather provide the wrong kind of bootblack stand? This community is trash!

These are all great things. We *should* have terps! It's *nice* when someone takes a newcomer under their wing personally.

Broadly speaking, our classes and events run on shoestring budgets. Almost everyone involved is an unpaid, overworked volunteer desperately trying to keep an ungainly plane in the air. Our boards are tiny and piece together events in their free time through a network of personal favors and the goodwill of sponsors. All of this runs on people just like you.

You gotta show up. Buy raffle tickets. Lend your sparkling wit. Volunteer in whatever capacity you can. Sit on committee. That's community.

This goes for informal social spaces too. I spent so long waiting for someone to swoop in and do the work of socializing for me. Finally realized: it's not enough to be open to the possibility of conversation! I have to approach people. And once we start, I gotta be fun to talk to!

Good parties happen because the people who attend put their energy into the space: through dress, demeanor, conversation, play.

@aphyr

2/n Things like title contests _can_ be highly mutually beneficial, but lately at least I’ve been running into a lot more of the ancillary baggage than increased fun (People chasing as beauty or popularity contest; exclusionary groups; High barrier to entry / “must own all gear yourself”). When they’re mutually beneficial: Person gets a platform and community gets someone dedicated to helping curate and grow it. Fresh ideas and perspective for a year is really good.