Gonna be honest. I've lost a lot of people lately both (to deaths and cut contacts)... and I feel like I've been gutted like a fish, and then stuffed full of razors ever since it all has happened.

It's been months, but the wound keeps getting worse, and I've felt viscerally ill every day since it started.

I feel horrible. Both mentally and physically from all of this, and I've been trying to pilot a ship that's already crashed.

It hurts me so much.