jaymebMy friend was complaining about a rude customer yesterday and he said, “She was shaped like a problem,” and then went into a description of her sharp edges and “I need to speak to your manager” haircut. And the only thing I could think was, “That’s a great line. I wish I was a writer.” @bookstodon #readerproblems #writerenvy
Dudula the Dud@jaymeb It sounds like a line from a Raymond Chandler novel, doesn't it? "She was shaped like a problem: sharp edges and 'Let me speak to your boss!' hair." @bookstodon
Shu Daizi@BackFromTheDud @jaymeb @bookstodon
"And the problem didn't untangle in the rest of her. She was looking at me with those sharp-edged eyes that smoldered fire. And when she crossed her legs, there wasn't any doubt she knew exactly how problematic she intended to be."
Richard@RuchardXBrooks So far we've got half a paragraph. Who's going to offer a Half-Mil advance on the film rights? 😂 @SDZ @jaymeb @bookstodon
@BackFromTheDud @RuchardXBrooks @jaymeb @bookstodon For the leading femme fatale, alas that we couldn't get Lauren Bacall. Now that was a woman shaped like a problem. She would never have 'let me speak to your boss' hair though :)
@SDZ Lauren Bacall was a woman shaped like a problem you'd enjoy solving, and take as long as you could over.....
Sorry, I'm getting a bit dizzy and need a cold shower...
@RuchardXBrooks @jaymeb @bookstodon
Sorry, I'm getting a bit dizzy and need a cold shower...
@RuchardXBrooks @jaymeb @bookstodon
@BackFromTheDud @RuchardXBrooks @jaymeb @bookstodon
"She sat quietly in the chair, knowing how those legs had worked on other men, knowing that I was just a man like all rest. Without moving a muscle, she was stalking me like a predator in the Serengeti. She was a woman shaped like a problem you'd want to solve. Not a young girl you wanted to help straighten out, but a crooked women who didn't mind being crooked, and maybe didn't mind having someone to help her."
"She sat quietly in the chair, knowing how those legs had worked on other men, knowing that I was just a man like all rest. Without moving a muscle, she was stalking me like a predator in the Serengeti. She was a woman shaped like a problem you'd want to solve. Not a young girl you wanted to help straighten out, but a crooked women who didn't mind being crooked, and maybe didn't mind having someone to help her."
@SDZ Just let me have one of the first copies, because that worked f*cking brilliantly! @RuchardXBrooks @jaymeb @bookstodon
@BackFromTheDud @RuchardXBrooks @jaymeb @bookstodon
What can I say, Lauren Bacall inspires me :)
@RuchardXBrooks @BackFromTheDud @jaymeb @bookstodon
Hehe, well you can find my books through the links in my profile, but... ah, they are of a slightly racier variety :)
@BackFromTheDud @RuchardXBrooks @jaymeb @bookstodon My current Vella series has a upcoming noir episode, but it's quite a bit in the future. I think Noir is tough to carry into erotica because so much of it is about vague undefined anxieties. The sex is implied sensuality, offscreen if at all, and even the violence is confusing and misunderstood. I think trying it will be fun though!
@SDZ You don't need to release it under the same name as your usual output, so nobody will expect sexuality. @RuchardXBrooks @jaymeb @bookstodon