Love it how when I establish a boundary I always have to feel bad about it. When I let it slip i feel bad for not standing up for myself, when I insist I feel bad because I had to take something from someone. Fucking traumatic upbringing. There is no way to not feel shit when dealing with this.
Summarily, this is one of these days I wish I had a mother or father to be all wise and caring, but alas...