Thread on a wild yet not uncommon exchange today. I share as an anecdote of how embedded racism is in our society & how close it's tied to economics
A white guy named "Bill" age ~60 says to, "Where are you *from* from?"
Me: [sigh] I'm from Pakistan. [I go back to my phone]
Bill: Pakistan? What do you do for a living?
Me: Civil rights lawyer
Bill: I'm a lawyer too! But I stay away from race & women stuff. Last thing I need is to be called racist or accused of sexual harassment
Me: Huh?
/1
Bill: So Pakistani? I'm a landlord too. Can I tell you a story about what my Indian tenant did to me?
Me: I don't need to kno—
Bill: So I raise her rent & she won't renew. So I tell her I have to bring in people to see the apt. But every time I'd bring a prospective tenant, she'd invite her Black friends to the apt.
Me: Uhh ok?
Bill: Don't you get it? No one wants to rent a place w/Black people around.
Me: Wait, I'm sorry, what?
Bill: Can you believe it? She did that on purpose!
Me:😳
/2
Me: Yeah, Bill. That's pretty racist. In fact, that's the definition of racism.
Bill: Oh no I'm not racist. The prospective tenants might be. But—
Me: You can probably stop talking. I'm good.
Bill: I need to pay my bills. Who cares if they're racist?
[He Kept Talking]
Bill: I can't be racist. I've dated Black women.
Me: Bill you should really stop. This dialogue doesn't need to go on.
Bill: But how can I convince you I'm not racist?
Me: You do not have to worry about me.
IN CLOSING
/3
4 lessons I want to point out:
First, he didn't see himself as racist b/c he "dated Black women"
•LESSON 1: Proximity to race isn't exemption from being racist
Second, he didn't mind racist tenants b/c it paid his bills
•LESSON 2: Financial power structures built on white supremacy perpetuate white supremacy
Third, he felt like he was the victim
•LESSON 3: Racists in power are used to privilege their entire lives, so equality feels like oppression
/4
Fourth, he desperately needed my validation & was upset I wouldn't offer it
•LESSON 4: It's not enough to be not racist, we must be anti-racist (Angela Davis)
Bill finally left feeling he'd been wronged & upset I wouldn't empathize.
This was an anecdote—but imagine this shameless racism played out across 50 states, hundreds of years, millions of housing units? That's systemic.
The fight for justice & equal access is ongoing. Stay active, stay engaged, and always speak truth & justice.
5/5
I am curious if you have ever been asked this question while you are in Brooklyn.
I think the assessed sincerity of the asker would play a part as would the askee's experience with the questioning.
In the Og post, it is obvious there wasn't a curiosity about the other person. There were no open ended questions, just statements about what he thinks Qasim wants to hear & what the speaker wants to hear in return. Interesting topic. I certainly will think twice b4 asking strangers where they are from. 😎
@Mari311 @QasimRashid
When a stranger is asking, no serious assessing of sincerity is possible, nor should anyone being asked that sort of question be forced into evaluating the questioner on the each occasion it occurs, itself a burden.
You seem more interested in defending yourself than contemplating that you may have inadvertently been one person in a long line of micro aggressions for many of the people you have asked. That being said, I am glad to hear that you will rethink the practice.
Qasim Rashid, Esq.
Roberta Millstein 🌎🌱🐩🏊🏼♀
Mari