YOU: I murdered someone.
YOUR DOG: I'm totally cool with that. I love you.
******************
YOU: I murdered someone.
YOUR CAT: Me too.
YOU: I murdered someone.
YOUR DOG: I'm totally cool with that. I love you.
******************
YOU: I murdered someone.
YOUR CAT: Me too.
@Jake_Vig Related and one I love:
A friend will help you move.
A good friend will help you move a body.