HAIL THE ORBmaybe I'll start a new shitpost thread for mastodon
the old thread is https://twitter.com/joe_no_privacy/status/1417332891105722371. going to start by copying over some "good ones"
people these days will ask questions like "is this loss?" all day long, but never the questions that matter, like "is this FOSS?"
choose freedom. choose free software
"im not owned! im not owned!!" I continue to insist as my screwdriver slips, allowing my beryllium neutron reflector to close around my plutonium core, inducing supercriticality
just got back from the worst wedding I've ever been to. let me tell you, when the invitation said "join us for our destination wedding on the beach", I didn't think they meant a landing at Normandy!
if a furry keeps telling everyone they're gonna make an awesome fursona, but never actually shares it, that makes them a vaporbear
if we're supposed to have a "free" market then why's everything so damn expensive
underwear with a built-in phone pocket, for men
who called it a pitcher plant and not a thirst trap
the fact that the sum of two even numbers is even and the sum of two odd numbers is also even is sickening proof that God is a malevolent bastard
guy who thinks the saying "when god closes a door, he opens a window" is advice on how to break into god's house and rob him
you can't fool me with your evil word games, liberal. I know when you say "linting and testing in your CI pipeline" you actually mean "AUTOMATED CENSORSHIP OF PERFECTLY FINE CODE FOR NO REASON"
ligma balls? what's a ligma ball?
if the "Great War" was so great, why didn't they have a Great War 2?
oh, so when *I* want to fuck a ghost I'm a "disgusting necrophiliac", but CBS makes it into a TV romcom and suddenly it's fine? fuck you, suck my dick (iff you're a ghost)
someone should invent a word you can say after gendered language that negates the gendered implication. like "no homo" but for gender
in general, my stance on being in pain is "ow ow ow ow ow ow ow"
CCW as in counterclockwise. not whatever you were thinking of
imagine reaching inside one of those Dyson Airblade things and suddenly a warm tongue licks your hand
oh, you’re a backend guy? that’s cool but tbh I’m more of a frontend guy myself. backend can get so messy and you have to prepare more, plus I never eat enough fiber :/
oh wait you were talking about computers
morass? yes, please!
oh, so you only hate newcomers to your hobby if they put in less than the minimum acceptable effort? you don't hold them to a higher standard than that? sounds like you're less of a gatekeeper and more of a doorman 😏
funny how you say you produce "vaporwave" and yet your albums have actually been released 🤔
old: Talking to other humans like one talks to LLMs.
bold: talk other humans like google
Appropriate Tributes@joe_no_body WARS FOR THE WAR GOD
@joe_no_body GUYS FOR THE GUY GOD
d@nny disc@ mc²@joe_no_body did you hear about the underground pitcher plant they discovered recently
@hipsterelectron oh yeah, that was super cool!
@joe_no_body UNDERWEAR FOR THE UNDERWEAR GOD
demize@joe_no_body expensive market doesn't have the same ring to it