USPS Tracking
1. We're not sure it exists.
2. It's arrived.

@kevinbruce Canada Post:

1. We're not sure it exists.
2. It's arrived.
3. It's on its way!

@kevinbruce (actually, my teasing here might be a bit misplaced. I've certainly encountered the behaviour, but I can't recall if it was Canada Post specifically.)
@kboyd still more accurate than an Apple progress bar ;)
@kevinbruce and to paraphrase Lewis Black, "Congratulations, Apple - you've ruined beachballs!"
@kevinbruce
# Don't forget FedEx:
🎁 Shipped
🚛 On its way!
❓ Something went wrong....
📆 .... Er.....
😅 It's here!
@kevinbruce but also sometimes 3. It's been stuck in Nashville for 3 weeks 🤷‍♀️

@kevinbruce I had a UPS parcel delivered that tracking said would be there end of day Wednesday. Then end of day Thursday. Then it was delivered early Friday with a label saying it was left by the door 12:17 Thursday.

No idea how they make deliveries so complicated.

@kevinbruce then there’s

3. We silently attempted delivery during the 3 minutes you ran to the bathroom from the lookout you’ve been manning all day. You can pick your package up clear across town from 4 to 5 today.

@cabbey I saw a meme once that was looking for new employees that were expert “ding and dashers” when they were kids 😂
@kevinbruce That happened to me yesterday: Amazon saying "Oh, it's been pushed to Friday or Saturday." then 2 hrs later, it's here.
@kevinbruce 3. Oops. It hasn’t arrived. 4. We’re not sure it exists. 5. Arrives (from actual experience)
@kevinbruce Amazon tracking. Your package is 5 stops away, and has been sitting at this location for 12 hours.
@kevinbruce I lost the tracking number for my daughters passport. I’m so screwed.