Noah S. McKinnonWatching this movie like I do everything else in my life: ten minutes late and with frequent pauses. #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty
Susan Sarandon sees a fastball go approximately 2,500 feet above the zone and gets horny. She’d love 1880s baseball. #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty
Ken Costner utters the F-word with all the conviction of the rich man in the Bible. #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty
Huge fan of the pink suit coat Max Parkin is wearing.
Also: who let Tim Robbins say “homeboy?” Twice? #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty
That’s right, Crash. Show the pitcher his place in society. #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty
Jesus Christ, Costner can’t do a speech. Homeboy should’ve been stuck in the minor leagues for acting. #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty
In the fullness of time, that Dwight Gooden reference is perhaps a little, uh, iffy. #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty
Bro, you’re getting poetry read to you in bed. Shut the fuck up, you uncultured pig. #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty
One man says no to Susan Sarandon and she’s immediately the horniest she’s ever been. #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty
“Oh, Crash, you do make speeches.” Does he? Does he now? #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty
The guy using the chicken bone cross on the bat is low key racist, right? #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty
“José, just touch the bat once. Just touch it once.”
And a thousand fanfics were born. #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty
Nuke’s rich inner speech is such a big part of this movie. Dude can’t have an unspoken thought. #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty
I want the accent of every single person in this movie not named Ken Costner. #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty
Is this why every Bethesda game hits you with “no lollygagging?” #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty
Gonna be real tough not to use the manager’s chain of curses. #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty
Me: repurposing my wife’s undergarments as compression sleeves.
Everyone I play basketball with: #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty
Would bet my house right now every baseball opinion Crash Davis has sucks ass. #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty
We’re like halfway into this movie and Costner still hasn’t hit a line. How the hell does he have a career? #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty
Susan doing a racism on Fernando Valenzuela 😬 #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty
Remember when 96 miles was a hardcore fastball? #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty
How do you get to fucking AAA and don’t know sometimes you throw the same pitch a couple times in a row? #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty
“Your fastball’s up.” In 25 years, that’d make him an incredible command guy, once you simplified that weirdass delivery. #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty
In another universe, the Bermuda Triangle is what Anaïs Nin called her anthology. #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty
“Unsnap My Stocking” is my second-favorite Toni Braxton song. #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty
Quoting William Blake should lose you the argument. #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty
Wait, this entire movie is an Inception spinoff? #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty
There’s that hand-eye coordination, Crash. #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty
That kimono is a fit and a half. I want one. #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty
where the shit did that cat come from #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty
“Sixty-Minute Man” somehow managed to be a colossal brag and *still* undersell the whole thing. #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty
lmao Susan Sarandon is literally just the dril candles tweet #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty
Hold on. HOLD ON.
Nuke’s pro debut had 18 strikeouts. That’s a minimum of 54 pitches.
It also had 18 walks. That’s a minimum of 76 pitches.
Then there’s all the wild pitches.
They made him throw probably 140-150 pitches for his first game as a pro pitcher and they’re wondering why the team sucks? #LWP #LaserdiscWatchParty