Today I feel like spreading rumours. So once again, if you boost this toot I will tell the world some (almost certainly false) scandalous rumour about you.

Once upon a time @[email protected] went to the store to buy cookies and milk and then forgot the milk.

This was so embarrassing that @[email protected] has never gone to a store again, and if you accidentally mention milk it is quite likely that @[email protected] will come up with some flimsy excuse to leave and may never talk to you again.