real friendship develops during le petite mort

Almost Famous ruined my fuckinng life

I'm having that recurrent fantasy where I'm leading the edgiest black metal band ever. It's the last gig for my tour. Everyone is hype as shit. The lead guitarist starts introducing the next song by playing the sickest riff known to mankind. I grab the microphone and build up the tension by pausing dramatically. I scream into the mic: "I'm tired of all the micwo-aggwessions"

kids play video games, mature adults do stuff like watching sports, betting on sports, falling into irrecoverable debt with the mafia after losing several bets in a row

never in a million years would i've imagined that mind control fetish content would become mainstream but by god, tiktok did it

burning myself while toasting pop tarts to prove myself i have what it takes to be a billionaire

instead of "math is hard" barbie dolls should've said "the pedagogic utility of calculus classes in high school is questionable"

*watching barney the dinosaur in 3D imax* why can't parents be sensible and NOT bring their kids to the movie theatre, some of us are trying to appreciate the art of cinema...

I decided to change my iPhone to an Android phone hoping that this will end my relationship.