Don't worry about what people "really" think. They're choosing only to share nice thoughts with you because they know the nasty ones are garbage B.S. and they're smarter than that. Everyone has nasty thoughts. You know they're B.S., other people know theirs are B.S., and if someone doesn't they have a rational problem to solve. We all know the truth. You're wonderful and pet peeves or petty judgements don't mean anything. That's why people don't share them. It's not important.

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You don't have to think about that. You don't have to fix that. You don't have to feel bad about having mean, nasty, ugly thoughts and feelings. It's not evil. Everyone has those. It what you do (or don't do) with those feelings that matters. Loving yourself is accepting those things, not requiring yourself to be pure and good. Have disgust. Have contempt. Be kind. That's all.