Children of these modern times will never know what it's like to gaslight yourself into liking an album that only has three or four good tracks because you spent $20 on it and that was, like...all your money.
Lauren O'Neal
@laurenoneal
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Coeditor of Empty the Pews: Stories of Leaving the Church. Former cohost of Sunday School Dropouts. I put the chic in Chicago Manual of Style.
On the other hand, children of these modern times will never know how easy it used to be to buy a CD as a gift! Gift shopping for my musician husband used to be so simple...
Kid on the subway: (babbling incessantly)
Mom: (patient, educational tone) Is this *necessary* or *unnecessary*?
Kid: ...Necessary.
Mom: No.
Kid: Argh, I always get that wrong!
In a Zoom meeting today, a cute dog appeared on a coworker's screen, and we asked the dog's name, and the dog's name was Grandpa.
I'm at SFO, and the security line situation is so chaotic that they just let everyone go through with our shoes still on and our laptops still in our bags.
Just found out blue whales can get infected with tapeworms and the tapeworms can be more than a hundred feet long.
"Have you heard the story of Patrick the Pony? The Shetland pony and unofficial mayor of Cockington?"
—a collection of words my husband just said
—a collection of words my husband just said
My MIL's friend loves when my husband and I visit because she can come over and kick our asses at Scrabble, but I managed to eke out one win out of three games.
